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[parodeity]

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[parodeity]

Workin' on it. [ terse and without inflection. he meant exactly what he said the other night. ]

[splinten]

[It won't work. He stops himself from coming out with that from tearing down another choice. From walling Dave in more.]

What's your way of workin' on it?

[parodeity]

Learnin' different. [ although he's not sure that even matters? but he can't make any choice right now so he may as well just learn to cut off caring so he can. ] I know what's right so it ain't gonna be that hard to mesh with it.

[splinten]

Could we... Would you be willing to talk with me about tryin' another way to work on it?

[This one will only make Dirk hate himself more. He can't say that though. Dave always wants him to say how he feels but right now he is sure the best thing he can do is stay calm and try to follow along.]

[parodeity]

[ dave looks at dirk across the table for a minute and thinks "right, that doesn't work either" and nothing does and he's going to break it worse talking about it and he wants to be someone else doing something else, a bird or a caterpillar or an atom with nothing in his head but the simplest of things and finally it slides into place, the layer of ice or water or a universe between dave and everything he doesn't want to feel. he settles, breathing evening out. ]

Sure. [ it's so much easier to lean back in his chair, slouching like he usually does, and let it happen. ] What other options did you think up?

[splinten]

[Oh no. He sees it happen, and it kills him.]

Pause.

[Dirk looks down at his food and he tries to eat instead of splintering.]

[parodeity]

[ sometimes when dirk says pause dave asks what he needs or draws back and tries to recalibrate or does more than just...stop.

this time he just watches dirk eat, realizes he hasn't eaten in too long, and comes up blank on any reasons not to eat. so he does that, since dirk made enough for two, anyway. he's not super interested in the food but he's not super interested in making himself sick for no reason, either. ]

[splinten]

[Dirk will finish his whole meal in silence. When he's done, when he's done what he's supposed to do, he looks up at Dave again.]

Are you doing the dissociation thing?

[parodeity]

[ dave eats most of his meal? so there's that. which leaves the dishes to be done as a task to slot into place, so he stands up to collect them. it's an easy x is true so y should happen situation, just like "i'm hungry, i should eat" removed from everything else that complicated it.

he takes dirk's dishes, too, to ferry to the sink for washing. ]

Probably.

[splinten]

['What should I do?' Is it even fair to ask that, he doesn't know. Should he help or leave? All he can do is close his eyes and let Dave act.]

Okay.

[parodeity]

You're not gonna unpause while it's happenin', are you.

[ an observation rather than an accusation. ]

[splinten]

I don't know if I can.

[If he tries to face it head on what will happen? The panic might build up again. He'll make it worse and everything will break.]

I can try.

[He can try to talk to Dave. He can try not to slip down into the well again.]

There's something wildly poetic about the parallelism. Like, this is some prime cliche character study shit. One brother sinks deeper and deeper into himself, and the other floats away.

[parodeity]

You don't need to force yourself?

[ but after putting the dishes in the sink dave will at least turn to listen. ]

And I'm not sure about the parallelism. Probably they're two different sides of the same thing moreso than exact opposites.

[splinten]

What's your interpretation?

[parodeity]

I think they're probably different methods of sinkin' deeper. Ask me later, though.

[ it's difficult to examine what he's doing as he's doing it. ]

[splinten]

Sure. [He won't push it. He hopes to a God he never believed in that not pushing it is the right thing.] What do you want to do?

[parodeity]

We can do whatever you want? [ he would say "talk about the options" but dirk isn't sure he can and dave won't go against that even distant as he feels right now. ] I still don't have any plans. I could probably do laundry or somethin' if you want to fuck off.

[ as in, if dirk doesn't want to stick around. ]

[splinten]

Would it help if I left?

[parodeity]

Would it help you?

[ dirk hit pause. dave...kind of did, too, in a way. ]

It probably won't do much either way. Not sure. You helped once or twice.

[splinten]

It wouldn't help me to leave. [That isn't what matters.] If I made it worse on you, it would be bad.

[parodeity]

You can't. [ like. he can't dissociate more probably, so? mostly dave just feels numb. ] We can do whatever you want 'till you hit play if you ever do, then? Movies or the DDR machine or whatever else.

[splinten]

Movies might be good.

[They can probably both relax at least a little watching movies.]

[parodeity]

You can pick your poison. I'll watch whatever.

[ movies are an easy way to zone out? last time they helped but dave isn't too. worried about that. ]

[splinten]

[Dirk mentally searches through films. LotR is too much of a commitment. Harry Potter features abuse and child soldiers. Stiller and Wilson films are too important to risk hurting like this. They did Spy Kids movies recently.]

We could do some Asylum Disaster films. [Same company as Sharknado. It should end up pretty entertaining?]

[parodeity]

Mega Shark Versus Giant Octopus?

[ it's the first one to come to mind. ]

That was gonna come out, like, a month after the game shit, so I never saw it.