[Dirk mentally searches through films. LotR is too much of a commitment. Harry Potter features abuse and child soldiers. Stiller and Wilson films are too important to risk hurting like this. They did Spy Kids movies recently.]
We could do some Asylum Disaster films. [Same company as Sharknado. It should end up pretty entertaining?]
Sure. [He makes a decision not to hug Dave. It feels... wrong, to do it when Dave is like this. It feels like taking advantage. So he will just head upstairs and set things up for watching. He grabs the archive of all the other Asylum films they have to pull down in case they decide they want to watch more.]
[ snacks are for the record fruit slices and popcorn and juice. when dave comes up he arranges them in the usual fashion on the table and takes his usual seat, sinking back into the couch and crossing one leg over the other knee. ]
[Dirk flops down; unlike Dave, he falls less into regularity than into a cross-legged pose, with a pillow dragged into his lap to hug and rest his chin against.] Same reason I minimized my watching of other films in this style. I do not find them super funny alone. I've gained a new appreciation for them since we started watching them together.
I didn't think filmmakin' would be your way, which isn't an issue to me. I like following along with your comics.
[They make him happy as they are. He absolutely reads them all the time.]
The issue with discountin' them is that I lack a favourite movie otherwise. There are favourite experiences of watchin' movies but that probably isn't what you are askin' for. Do you have a favourite movie?
It's maybe my favourite. I think that will change, though. It's been sort of traditionally the case that my experience of cinema has been highly referential and very much through a lens of understanding and responding to the culture that came before me, which in some ways I considered it my responsibility to try to analyse and bear witness to. I've kinda given up that thought as being totally stupid, but my general enjoyment of things definitely affected by the necessarily analytic perspective I took and the weight of history and association that every film seemed to be anchored in. I've only really started to watch movies as an experience to relax and enjoy since I started watchin' them with you, and I don't think at this point I've actually watched enough movies from this new perspective I get with you to give a true answer to the question of what I would call my favourite. I'll try to answer you when I can?
I did enjoy the movies. [but.] I never watched them just to enjoy them.
It sounds ridiculous from a pre-apocalyptic perspective, but to me they were important cultural artefacts, all requiring close scrutiny to understand their place in the historical past I was always trying to memorialize.
[so he means..............
he never watched a movie just for enjoyment's sake until Dave asked him to]
[ ? ? ? not sure if computes, surely dave makes dirk more tired. ]
It's not like I don't understand that, but even I found time to chill the fuck out back in the day. This is one of those opposite direction things, maybe.
I'm not sayin' that I never did. But aside from the issue where boredom allowed me time to contemplate how much I hated myself and how deeply alone I was, as I got older and understood more about myself and my circumstances, I felt like I was racing against a tickin' clock to try to be what I needed to. There were so many things to do and so many improvements I had to make on myself that it felt like I was wastin' my life if I wasn't in some way engagin' in something to those ends. Part of why I developed AR was to have yet another me to do all the things I needed to do, this one tireless and high-processing unlike my faulty and melancholia-prone brain. It's only been in the last year that I've started to consider chillin' somethin' I should actually permit myself.
If you mean the six months between game entry and your arrival, those would be the months featuring my self-distancing from two of my best friends while I simultaneously self-destructed on my other best friend, who was also my boyfriend. My fear of my friends hating me and everything bad about me ruining things was at an all time high. I was exhausted almost constantly.
[So. Not relaxing?]
It isn't that we didn't have any fun times, or that I never relaxed in the almost sixteen years before that. Just that feeling happy and relaxed was more of a rare exception than anything else, and generally my state of mind has changed to something much more capable of handling periods of calm and pure enjoyment since we met and started talkin'. As compared to before, when it was difficult to really accept those moments even when the opportunity presented itself.
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We could do some Asylum Disaster films. [Same company as Sharknado. It should end up pretty entertaining?]
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[ it's the first one to come to mind. ]
That was gonna come out, like, a month after the game shit, so I never saw it.
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[It sounds terrible but in a good way.]
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[ shark or octopus. who are you feeling the team spirit for, dirk. ]
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[ not because he's hungry just out of habitual feeling that dirk should eat stuff, why this ]
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Why've you never seen this?
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[ movie, he means. ]
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[There's too much sentimental value mixed up in SBAHJ. Only Dave can get more of that affection out of him.]
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[ what is dave going to make other than dumb home videos at this point in the post-apocalypse? ]
So discountin' 'em.
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[They make him happy as they are. He absolutely reads them all the time.]
The issue with discountin' them is that I lack a favourite movie otherwise. There are favourite experiences of watchin' movies but that probably isn't what you are askin' for. Do you have a favourite movie?
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[ stupid best friend time travel shenanigans. he's there for bullshit like that. ]
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he debates asking about favorite movie experiences but decides he probably doesn't want to know.
also i looked it up and what utter bullshit THEY DIE IN A BATTLE TO THE DEATH, WHERE WAS MY LEGITIMATE OCTOPUS VS SHARK BATTLE? ]
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It's maybe my favourite. I think that will change, though. It's been sort of traditionally the case that my experience of cinema has been highly referential and very much through a lens of understanding and responding to the culture that came before me, which in some ways I considered it my responsibility to try to analyse and bear witness to. I've kinda given up that thought as being totally stupid, but my general enjoyment of things definitely affected by the necessarily analytic perspective I took and the weight of history and association that every film seemed to be anchored in. I've only really started to watch movies as an experience to relax and enjoy since I started watchin' them with you, and I don't think at this point I've actually watched enough movies from this new perspective I get with you to give a true answer to the question of what I would call my favourite. I'll try to answer you when I can?
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You can't actually mean you never watched a movie just for enjoyment's sake 'till you got here.
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It sounds ridiculous from a pre-apocalyptic perspective, but to me they were important cultural artefacts, all requiring close scrutiny to understand their place in the historical past I was always trying to memorialize.
[so he means..............
he never watched a movie just for enjoyment's sake until Dave asked him to]
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[ real q ]
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[Dave makes him be less tired is the answer.]
Back then, being exhausted all the time was the state of being that I preferred.
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It's not like I don't understand that, but even I found time to chill the fuck out back in the day. This is one of those opposite direction things, maybe.
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I'm not sayin' that I never did. But aside from the issue where boredom allowed me time to contemplate how much I hated myself and how deeply alone I was, as I got older and understood more about myself and my circumstances, I felt like I was racing against a tickin' clock to try to be what I needed to. There were so many things to do and so many improvements I had to make on myself that it felt like I was wastin' my life if I wasn't in some way engagin' in something to those ends. Part of why I developed AR was to have yet another me to do all the things I needed to do, this one tireless and high-processing unlike my faulty and melancholia-prone brain. It's only been in the last year that I've started to consider chillin' somethin' I should actually permit myself.
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[ like holy shit the meteor kids at least managed to find time to do fuck all. ]
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[So. Not relaxing?]
It isn't that we didn't have any fun times, or that I never relaxed in the almost sixteen years before that. Just that feeling happy and relaxed was more of a rare exception than anything else, and generally my state of mind has changed to something much more capable of handling periods of calm and pure enjoyment since we met and started talkin'. As compared to before, when it was difficult to really accept those moments even when the opportunity presented itself.
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