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[parodeity]

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[splinten]

If it is, then it has been winning.

There are some things I'd actually like to talk with you about at some point, since as you can imagine I have not in fact suddenly decided I'm ok with the current state of affairs, and you should probably reassess if you think that's something I'm even capable of.
We don't have to address them now, and doing so would probably be a bad idea. But in the debate between whether it was shitty to have this hang over your head or if it was shitty to never bring up that I'm not satisfied, I decided you'd probably at least want to hear me vocalize how I feel about a thing, which is to say I am as I just declared myself to be.
On top of that, I've been worried that if I ever bring any of it up, I'll basically be springing it on you, and surprise traps are not a thing I want to do to you.
So yeah.
That's been percolating for a while.
Feel free to breeze past this and go back to how stupid it is that I probably made a robo peg leg for Lord English.

[parodeity]

why is it probably why arent you sure

what things did you want to talk about

[splinten]

Because I don't know if we know for sure that Callie's brother is Lord English.

Far be it from me to predict the course of one of our conversations, but generally speaking, where we stand with each other and why I don't consider it a positive.
Like I said, it isn't something I want to spring on you, so please don't consider this a demand for your time. But on the flipside, it felt like like breaking the rules if I didn't tell you.

[parodeity]

genuinely dont know enough about your aliens to be able to say with any degree of certainty
if it sounds like the stupidest option go with yes

my times yours whenever you want it
you dont know where we stand though
?

[splinten]

Then I made a peg leg for Lord English.

I have a sense that might be correct or not. My sense as it stands is one that doesn't provoke satisfaction in me.
On the other hand, I don't mind waiting indefinitely if you don't feel even a begrudging willingness to broach that topic. It's a pretty complicated one besides, and for my part I'm genuinely nervous about being able to clearly and accurately express my feelings without any overwhelming blunders of miscommunication.

[parodeity]

why

if you want to talk about it we can
will it make you happier

[splinten]

Because he asked and I was bored.
And genuinely was amused by the dude, right up until he told me that he had in fact actually killed his sister.

There is a reasonable probability it will work in the opposite direction.

[parodeity]

well
that sucks

thats not super helpful

im sorry i woke you up btw

[splinten]

It does a lot..
Also, sorry. I don't think my heads up went the way I wanted it to.
As insane as it will sound, I find it genuinely comforting to be woken up by you.

[parodeity]

its fine
we can not talk about it if it would make you unhappy

that sounds insane
why the hell do you find it comforting
the point of leaving the room was so at least one of us could sleep

[splinten]

That isn't really what I meant. My happiness isn't really important to it. My priority is not springing this discussion on you.

Same reason I appreciate having your particular soul in my metaphorical peripheral. It's comforting to be reminded throughout the night that you're around. Smooths over certain anxieties.

[parodeity]

i think every conversation anyone has is sprung on them to some extent man
you cant prepare people for everything
least of all me

oh
hey dirk

[splinten]

That's a really philosophical approach to my failed effort to avoid being a dick.

What's up?

[parodeity]

im never prepared for conversations about
anything
regardless of how much time i have to prep
if im lucky i dont get physically ill
i havent pulled that one on you yet
i usually manage to do it beforehand if ive got warning
so i guess thats like in the pros column
insofar as it can be
i dont really like feelings jams
about me
i guess

lots of constellations mostly
i think i made up some names for some of these
but i cant remember them
it was months ago
there were stories and everything
but i didnt write them down

[splinten]

Does it help if it's feelings jams about us? Or does that make it worse.

That seems like it wasn't what the 'hey Dirk' was for.
Making up constellations is a pretty enjoyable exercise though.

1/2

[parodeity]

i dont know

yeah it wasnt
what i was gonna say was
like
hypothetically speaking
its possible
that maybe

[parodeity]

[ there's a few minutes of texts half typed, deleted, rewritten, deleted, and just. general dithering. a few minutes turns into probably ten, during which he won't respond to any messages dirk might send if he gets impatient. dirk usually waits, though, for dave to stumble through thoughts.

if he waited this time, what he gets is the result of dozens of attempts before dave whittled it down to a brief truthful sentence: ]

im not fine rn

[splinten]

[Dirk sends no messages in that gap. Maybe if a full hour passed, he'd go for it, but he knows Dave. He knows if there are that many interruptions, he is trying to say something true. That is always worth waiting.]

Yeah. I know.
Hypothetically speaking, I'd offer to hang out with you in person, or to just keep talkin' with you over text.

[parodeity]

are you ok

[splinten]

I'm not at my best. I could even toss out suboptimal again. But I'm not doing bad.
'Ok' genuinely seems like the most accurate word.

[parodeity]

stop trying to make suboptimal happen gretchen
did me saying im not fine make you more or less ok

[splinten]

Fuck you, Regina, suboptimal is so going to happen.
You're going to call me insane again, but as you can probably guess, it made me feel more ok. It was a relief to hear you say it.

[parodeity]

for real though get a new pet word that i can actually get behind
one that sounds like
less obviously nerdy?

stay there

[splinten]

What's nerdy about a word that immediately invokes Optimus Prime? I am hip as shit, bro.

Ok.

[parodeity]

everything you just said was the opposite of hip oh my fuck

[ he'll stop texting, though. he specifically told dirk to stay put. that was not an indication that dave planned on staying put, and his communicator is ditched into his sylladex. he doesn't bother to move at anything less than flashstep to get to the room and then the bed, at which point he's up the ladder of the bunk bed and crawling over dirk to get near the wall.

he doesn't actually say anything but this is happening now, i guess, sorry dirk. ]