You wanted me to cut to the part where I said how I feel. So that's how I feel. My issues are in continuity of selfhood and a feeling of being inaccessible to others. But I considered it in terms of selfhood and splinters, and it's something I can reconcile with, particularly with my dreamself operating. So we should be okay now.
[ this time dirk earns a string of dave just swearing under his breath for a bit while dave drops his shades into his sylladex so his hands are free to jam the bases of his palms into his eyes.
the pressure doesn't help but at least it blocks his line of sight. ]
I'm saying that I have enough splinters operating here that any continuity of self I'd like is maintained. Like how when my dream and physical selves were knocked out, I shunted over to Jake's brain splinter of me. So it isn't an issue.
That makes zero sense. [ mostly because dirk's talking like a heart player and dave's thinking like a time player. ] You're always continuitous to yourself.
[ he won't ask dirk to flip out with rose on the kharaa thing because of various reasons, and has to adjust when he'd asked solely so he could crush the instinct to ask dirk for help. ]
I checked departures, too. Just the two of them. [ john and homura. it's easier to talk about the warper thing than any of the issues he's refusing to acknowledge. ]
[ he doesn't mean to see her disappear, though dave supposes that's possible - except, no, he hadn't seen himself. but he was kind of out of it so that didn't mean a whole fucking lot. ]
[ completely deadpan neutral. dave has spent the day resigning himself to that particular eventuality, inbetween his...everything else. people leave, that's life, and yet again he's realized he's relying too heavily on the people who could leave. it's a balancing act dave has never gotten right. ]
John's current for a given value of "current", yeah.
[ he forgot like everything dave brought him up to speed on the first time around, but...whatever. at least that was probably just awkward as fuck instead of anything else. ]
What? He fuckin' forgot everything we went through the first time, I didn't have time to entirely catch him up. Or I didn't feel like doin' it all in one go.
[ deliberately picking the topic that dirk probably wasn't referring to. ]
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[ that's not how a talk works but that's the part he needs to hear right now. ]
But sure, that works as well as anything else as an explanation. Time and space don't actually matter, except as constructs.
[ dave just holds his own shades loosely in his palms, flipping them over a few times to examine them from all angles. ]
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[That is not what Dave asked him to say.]
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Dirk.
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[ jfc that wasn't the answer he was expecting? so there's annoyance in his tone even though it's unwarranted. ]
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[suck it dave]
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the pressure doesn't help but at least it blocks his line of sight. ]
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Dirk sits patiently through this.]
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wait. ]
Are you sayin' your dreamself stays split off temporally?
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I'm saying that I have enough splinters operating here that any continuity of self I'd like is maintained. Like how when my dream and physical selves were knocked out, I shunted over to Jake's brain splinter of me. So it isn't an issue.
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That makes zero sense. [ mostly because dirk's talking like a heart player and dave's thinking like a time player. ] You're always continuitous to yourself.
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[ they can obviously both! be! confused!
there's a lot dave should probably say, or things he should ask.
he's never sure where to start and he's not sure he wants to try, so he ignores all of it for the time being. ]
I'll...take it under advisement.
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Okay then, so we're good on that? Aside from you apparently needing time to process not getting the answer you expected.
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[ he won't ask dirk to flip out with rose on the kharaa thing because of various reasons, and has to adjust when he'd asked solely so he could crush the instinct to ask dirk for help. ]
I checked departures, too. Just the two of them. [ john and homura. it's easier to talk about the warper thing than any of the issues he's refusing to acknowledge. ]
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Warpers?
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[ he didn't interfere with either because he hadn't interfered with either, so it was pointless to try. ]
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Was it Precursor tech?
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[ he doesn't mean to see her disappear, though dave supposes that's possible - except, no, he hadn't seen himself. but he was kind of out of it so that didn't mean a whole fucking lot. ]
It turned on randomly. She got sucked in.
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[Dirk isn't getting pulled out of here yet.]
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[ there is absolutely no guarantee either of them won't up and disappear through a portal.
and if they come back, they may remember fuck all. ]
John seems ok, at least. Still can't stay in one fuckin' spot when told to, but I guess that's part of his charm.
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[There is a way. Not because it makes sense, but because Dirk needs it. Because Dirk refuses to leave Dave.]
He mentioned the door. That makes him current with us.
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[ completely deadpan neutral. dave has spent the day resigning himself to that particular eventuality, inbetween his...everything else. people leave, that's life, and yet again he's realized he's relying too heavily on the people who could leave. it's a balancing act dave has never gotten right. ]
John's current for a given value of "current", yeah.
[ he forgot like everything dave brought him up to speed on the first time around, but...whatever. at least that was probably just awkward as fuck instead of anything else. ]
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[Dirk's voice is quiet because he knows what Dave is thinking.]
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[ deliberately picking the topic that dirk probably wasn't referring to. ]
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