parodeity | subnautica ic inbox 2.0;

[Dave has the expected reaction. He can't judge Dirk for his responses.]

It isn't a trap.

[He should clarify this.]

I didn't think it was.

[ he's prone to thinking dirk sets up conversational traps more than any other kind.

but he was not expecting a random not-anniversary. he'll...open it??? ]

It's just that I didn't...yeah.

[Inside is… a picture book! On the right side, each fold contains a drawing, while on the left side, there is a poem. The book is hand-bound, hand-drawn, and hand-written. He used yarn to stitch the pages together, tying knots at either side.

Each of the pictures is a setting. They’re beautifully drawn—Dirk actually is capable of art, surprisingly, and seems to have done a good job on these scenes. The locations should be familiar. It starts with the rooftop on LOTAK and goes forward to the kitchen on base as it was at first arrival, a dreamscape, the volcano, the dream pods… The newest page is the tree they had their last conversation in. In fact, all of them are locations where Dave and Dirk have had an important conversation. Each of the scenes holds a sense of serenity and peace to them.

Paired with each image is a terrible Seussean poem in the style of Green Eggs and Ham. Except instead of talking about not eating green eggs and ham, it is written along the lines of “We would be brothers in a tree / We would be brothers by the sea.” It is honestly hilariously simplistic because Dirk has to get his irony in somewhere, and it is apparently by pretending they're in the ages 5-8 reading group.

There several extra sheets, not yet inserted, which can easily be added in thanks to the way Dirk bound the book.

Dirk is of course watching Dave with some intense scrutiny here. He is not great at hiding his nerves in terms of that level of focus.]

It's, uh, been in the making for a while. This seemed like the best time for it.

[ oh.

dave's never really been good at the drawing portion of artwork. camerawork he can handle - he's done bad shots on purpose there before but actually has an eye for framing things. nine-ish months of near continuous photo-taking has actually improved his skill there. nothing and no one can improve his actual drawing and painting skills, and this has never really bothered him. rose and dirk both got the actually decent crafting genes, he thinks - though admittedly he's not sure about roxy's art skills. maybe it's one of those things that just skipped one of four.

it's reminiscent of one of rose's over the top sentimental gifts because apparently she got that from dirk. dave turns each page carefully, the book in his lap, and just....

he feels a lot of things, almost too many things, but it's a good kind of too much instead of a bad one. there's no settled feeling other than "slightly overwhelmed" so his expression is one of those default neutral ones as he hits the end, and shifts his gaze from the book to dirk.

the poems mean something, and he wonders suddenly how long it takes dirk to believe anything he tells him, anything dave said to him in any of these places. will it ever be easier for either of them? ]

Thanks. For this. [ dave shuts the book, as gently as possible. he should be able to say something else, or just hug dirk, or something, so - ] Do you want to see LOHAC? Just telepathic.

[ he doesn't have any presents on him, okay. an impression of his planet is the best he can do on short notice. ]

[He tries not to stare at Dave through every turn of the page. He does not do well. He tries not to worry about whether it's the good overwhelmed or bad. He fails at that too. He tries, very hard, not to be afraid of that neutral expression, and even the 'thanks' doesn't comfort him.

But when Dave closes the book, gently, Dirk thinks that maybe he did okay.]

Uh. Sure. That'd be cool.

[His breathing is still very quiet. The nerves still haven't faded.]

[ a lot of LOHAC he hadn't liked. the danger and metal and death. but there were always parts he did, and even lava has a weirdly comforting quality these days because on the whole, LOHAC hadn't completely sucked. he'd liked his consorts. he'd learned how to loop there. there'd be truly terrible parts, but -

something good. okay. one of the more absurd moments comes to mind and dave concentrates just enough to let through an image/feeling of the LOHAC stock exchange. there's absolutely no real reason to share this, or anything else. it's just a dumb thing he thinks will either make dirk laugh or which would, you know, at least baffle dirk enough to be kind of amusing.

dave's game playthrough was a little bit stupid, in retrospect. the nakodiles had been too easy to trick but he's felt mostly amused affection for them when they weren't stealing his shades or whatnot. the stock market had been his first ever series of bullshit loops built out for a long while and had been a kind of funny learning curve. impressions of heat and turning gears overlay everything in the flash of memory, along with the sense of being in the right place at the right time absolutely, before he lets it go again. ]

I kinda miss those dudes.

[It definitely gets Dirk to laugh.]

They seem hilarious. Not getting Consorts feels like one of the biggest letdowns of our session.

[ it is not even his dumbest memory there but good that was the goal: making dirk laugh or getting him to. not be tense. dave's lips quirk up. ]

Probably were, though I like, wrecked their economy. Did I ever tell you I'm basically a stock market beast? I mean, time powers kinda give that a for sure thing, but I'm pretty good at math and probabilities. Also, they were like. Not super smart, admittedly.

[It is a success, Dirk is more chill now.]

I seem to recall the occasional allusion to you using temporal abilities to entirely devastate a society's economic system, yes. Lovin' math's a good base for your science things.

I'm not sure love would've always been the best word - math just makes sense, you know? The answers aren't in question unless you get into the really gnarly still bein' figured out portions of it. There's a right answer or wrong ones and they don't change on you in general. And these days I can't help thinkin' in numbers sometimes, even if half the secret of time is that eventually it becomes meaningless.

[ why is he talking about this why can't he just come up with something profound ]

What would your favorite school subject have been?

I think that's one of the most reassuring parts of mathematics. It follows an essentially logical structure, even where it acts counterintuitively.

[He is. Surprised by the second thing?]

I never thought about it.

[his AU Fantasies did not involve school, they involved ninja fights vs juggalos]

Well, now you can? Not like I can really say for sure either since I didn't like...

[ well bro was a little controlling and never bothered to feed dave or do most domestic things so school and doctors visits were some of those things that weren't like huge priorities? ]

I mean, you probably wouldn't like any classes. You try really hard to cede control but it doesn't come naturally to you in most situations, does it?

[Dave, he gave you a touching brotherly present and now you're calling him out for being a control freak.]

It's possible that if I'd been socialized in the 21st century, I would have been more willing to take my education institutionally. As it is, it's hard for me to imagine any appeal in anything but an autodidactic approach. I prefer taking my own pace and following my own interests.

That sounds fake tbqh. Socializing you would not change the parts of you that're you. You'd hate havin' to sit in a room with people who didn't get the way you think while not bein' allowed to share what you thought about shot re discourse because you were just a student or whatever.

[ the calling out continues ]

You don't always have to stop yourself from bein' the naggy control freak you are, y'know.

[THE CALLING OUT WON'T STOP.]

Being a wet blanket control freak isn't one of my most flattering traits.

[He'll respond to that because Dave is still calling him out about school and Hey.]

I think it's probably more related to what you'd do it with that makes it flattering or unflattering; the context is important. Sometimes it's really nice not to be in charge. I'm not sure if you ever feel like that, though.

[ he's also not sure if he should feel like that? although he also doesn't like to cede control in situations that hit too close to home, but. being the leader of anything had never appealed to dave. the closest he's gotten is enjoying being in charge of their training sessions. ]

I've had times that I've felt like that. [He is thinking about it, considering where the appeal is.] Sometimes it's kinda nerve-wracking not being in control. When I can trust in it, though, it's good.

Sometimes it's a relief to let Rose make decisions about day to day activities. You too, but you do it less 'cause you freak out more about the bossy nagging sibling thing. I assume this says somethin' unfortunate about me like most things tend to but whatever. It isn't like Rose is likely to stop doing her whole Rose thing and since I don't mind it, it's probably okay?

[ things like what they'll do when they hang out or nagging reminders to eat or talk to someone or whatever. ]

Edited 2017-01-15 06:53 (UTC)

It makes you both happy, I'm assumin', especially if Rose has inherited my impulse to tell everyone what's best for the and bother them until they go along with it. So it should be okay.

[He isn't entirely sure what to say on his part. He does have his control freak impulses, and he still hasn't truly settled how to handle them. Sometimes he backs off too hard and sometimes he pushes too strong. It's a process, working it out.]

Yeah. She'd leave me alone if I ever legitimately did anything other than bitch to bitch.

[ because he obviously has to put up some token resistance for her? ]

Some things I need to be in control of and she never bothers me about those. I'm not sure how she knows the difference.

[ a small frown, but more thoughtful than anything else. maybe it's calculated on rose's part; maybe it's a seer thing. he'd have to ask to know and she might bullshit him. ]

Quite probably something she'd be vague and unclear about if asked. Either way, she knows you well enough to look after you.

[There's a little half-apologetic expression.]

I... know that I have a lot of catchin' up to do before I can meet the standard she said. I'm hopin' it'll come with time.

It's not like that doesn't go both ways. I'm pretty crap at fraternal support. I'm hopin' eventually I will attain "semi functional human being" when faced with a sibling crisis that requires me to like...say things right.

[ like what the fuck to say when someone is drunk and on a downward spiral. or a million examples from his history with dirk. ]

She would be stupid vague, shit. Half the time I think bein' answer means you gotta do your best unhelpful magic eight ball impression, but then I remember that's just Rose.

You said something to me about hammerin' this sort of thing out due to not havin' guides of our own.

[It's kinda ridiculous, all the little things that Dave said which Dirk has kept with him. That is one of them.]

Do we have other Seers? I know the only other Prince is dead. I don't know how many of the surviving trolls overlap with ours.

Terezi's Seer of Mind. Kan's Sylph of Space then Vris is Thief of Light, jugglo mcfucknuts is Bard of Rage and Vantas is Knight of Blood. For who overlaps, though...Aradia has my aspect, Tav has John's I'm pretty sure, weird sweaty horse guy has his class, fishtroll princess had Jade's class, you and cat troll share an aspect but she has mom's class, sweaty horse troll has mom's aspect, we covered genocidal fish guy as bein' Prince and he was also Hope, fish princess was also Life and Aradia was Maid. I think that covers all the overlaps?

[ he has spent too much time in dreambubbles with a zillion dead trolls, god. ]

Are you saying that me telling you that about brotherhood was knowin' the right thing to say?

You might consider being better at their names than their mythological roles.

[not that either helps, like most of them are super dead and Dirk will never meet them]

I'm saying that it was something that has stuck with me, and which has helped me a lot to remember.

TOO BAD YOU HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT NOW

wow????????

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