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[parodeity]

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[parodeity]

If you don't ask for it, it can't be used against you. Oh, but that doesn't apply to you. You can ask for anythin' and you will get it.

[ this is said to. the magister. what the fuck dave. ]

Within reason, darlin'. Although you've never actually asked for anything without reason. How the fuck did Rose and I manage to raise someone halfway functional, that's a mystery we may as well ignore.

[ yeah he's just gonna talk to his fish child while he boosts up to actually open the tank and dump in the Goods ]

[splinten]

My personal fear is not an active weaponizing of my desires than it is the passive disregard for them.

[The difference between an empty house and a house with monsters in it.]

[parodeity]

I'll always try to listen if you ask, Dirk. If I don't, you'll remind me. Won't you?

[ it was on the list, or he thought it was, but maybe it doesn't actually matter. dave shuts the tank hatch and rests his forehead against the glass. he wrinkles his nose when the magister taps the glass where he's leaning in, a reluctant smile working its way out. ]

[splinten]

I will. Or I'll try. Part of that involves you asking me to say them.

[A pause while he watches Dave.]

Sorry for already being a headache to live with.

[parodeity]

Nope. Only cause to my current headache is decidedly not you.

[ so he isn't allowed to apologize for it? apparently. ]

That honor is on lockdown and I'm p sure no one else can touch any of it. They are simply the best there is at headaches.

[splinten]

As a group, our proclivity for snowclonage is phenomenal. Not the tendency towards it, which would be commonplace for any collection of individuals transmitting information of a meta-communicative level as enabled by memes, but the frequency with which we rely on things said within our groups to develop memetic phrasing.

[u sure the headache isn't dirk]

I don't want you to get exhausted by having to live with me.

[parodeity]

[ no he's used to that bullshit it's like talking to rose ]

Do you want to hear a really obvious fact?

[splinten]

Uh. Okay.

[Feels like a trap though. Dirk's spine kinda. shifts a bit, shoulders drawing back. As if he's preparing to be shoved away.]

[parodeity]

One of the most exhaustin' things I have done here so far was not livin' with you.

[ it is still exhausting him. ]

[splinten]

[That is not shoving Dirk off of a rooftop. He is not sure how to balance himself after not taking the push.]

Oh.

[parodeity]

I thought we covered that.

[ still to the glass, still conversationally. ]

[splinten]

In terms of naps and things.

[Dirk knows he's good for that.

Dirk still is pretty sure he is emotionally exhausting to be around.]

[parodeity]

That's not how I meant it, genius.

[ re: what he just said, dave means. it is true that it has been physically exhausting, yes. but it isn't what he meant. ]

[splinten]

That was not established.

[That was probably established by Dave, to an idiot.]

Okay. I'll.

[Er.]

Make an effort on believing that to be a thing that is true.

[parodeity]

It was - is - exhausting. You told me you were glad I moved out and I told you not to say that, ever, because I didn't want to hear it or think about it. I know how you meant it, don't bother arguin' that, I'm not a dumbass - you said it was a relief and better for my health and maybe I could sleep but it was exhausting. Not in the sleepin' way.

[ he stops leaning against the glass, but doesn't look over. ]

And it was still a million times better than it would or will be if or when I have to let it go a second time. So - I can only hand you over so many weapons at once. The ones specially prepped to make Dave filet or whatever, I mean. Give me a little longer to sharpen a few more knives before I toss them your way to do with what you will.

[splinten]

[It all makes a lot of sense. Again and again, he regrets that Dave can't take contact right now.]

Okay. Just... I'm not putting them in any fridge, metaphorical or otherwise. Just so you know.

[parodeity]

You wouldn't hurt me on purpose. I know.

[ not in the way bro would have. ]

Sorry I'm already a headache to live with?

[splinten]

Not a headache, bro. This is still where I want to be.

[He pauses.]

So do I get to swim with Snoop?

[parodeity]

If we go out with him?

[ since the whole

tank thing

HAD TO BE DECONSTRUCTED SO NO PART WAS BIG ENOUGH FOR A WARPER AS SUGGESTED dave did implement that. ]

[splinten]

Yes. For walkies.

[He will not try to swim in a postmodern tank? Like he could try. And it would be weird and maybe awful.]

[parodeity]

For a bit, sure. But some of that I try to like - [ ok he hasn't thought about it before, but. ] I guess sometimes I try to keep the swims to me and him or me and him and rose or him and rose, because I think it's important to...have that.

[ a guardian who wants to spend time with just you, for a little while. no split focus. ]

[splinten]

[Dirk parses the meaning.]

It is important.

[Dirk would have done anything to have even a chance at it.]

[parodeity]

He was unlucky enough to see our meddlin' mugs first thing after hatchin'. By mutual agreement we never actually discussed, I guess we've both been tryin' to do right in ways we never actually learned.

[ for whatever reason. ]

I like kids. I didn't know that before we got here. I mean, I liked the consorts fine, but yeah.

[splinten]

[Dave would make a good parent. Dirk is sure of that, as sure as he is that he has no idea whether or not to say it. He settles on some kind of middle ground.]

You've been doing well with the Magister. He's lucky he got you two.

[Dirk thinks, and wonders if it would ever help to say, that his Bro could never replace Dave because Dave can never really answer that longing. Dave is not Dirk's guardian and never will be. How could that guardian somehow replace him?]

[parodeity]

Yeah, maybe.

[ he steps away from the glass. ]

So, five am tomorrow? That's what you said, right.