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[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER

consider this your warning about stairs. itll just keep happening bro. im telling you man

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[parodeity]

[ this would be so much easier if dave were not actively not throwing the game?

king of diamonds. I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAD TO LIST OUT WHAT WAS ALREADY THROWN DOWN. ]

[windeity]

[Dave let him win this one!! Also you're smarter than me I just left the whole thread open. Either way it's almost immediate as he slams down king of clubs.]

[parodeity]

[ NO!!!

KING OF DIAMONDS he has. ten cards left. if he gets trapped in spades or clubs again he will Die. since he definitely does not have anything not red. ]

[windeity]

[HE IS DOING HIS BEST and there's a quick draw before triumphantly throwing down the eight of diamonds because. BECAUSE.]

Spades.

[parodeity]

[ this is the stupidest direction this thread could have taken and dave considers for a moment throwing his cards at john's face but instead he pulls. three more fucking cards. to get the two of spades, which he throws down with

he's actually nearly scowling. it's the barest tilt downwards of his lips. amazing.

12 CARDS, AGAIN. ]

[windeity]

[Oh I could make it a lot stupider, but thank you for not throwing cards, Dave. John looks fairly pleased with himself and easily sets down the three of spades. Back down to seven. Let him win!!!]

[parodeity]

[ no, three of hearts. >[

11 cards. he can't win this but apparently he's gong to make it as annoying as humanly possible. ]

[windeity]

[WHY. He draws one card and thankfully it only has to be one card since it's the two of hearts and he slams it down on the pile.

And promptly sends the pile of cards flying off the roof.

...well. Okay. Whoops. He'll just...peer over the edge and watch the cards flutter away. Bye cards.]

[parodeity]

[ well now what. was that just their discards or the draw pile, too. i need 2 know. ]

[windeity]

[It was definitely the discards and like most of the draw pile, so someone is going to walk out of the dorm in the morning and find most of a deck of playing cards.]

...eheh. Well...whoops.

[parodeity]

...Do we finish it with what we got or modify this to war. Best two out of three battles.

[ they should each have at least more than three cards in their hands? he shuffles his and places them face down in front of him. ]

Or best one out of one, if you feel particularly lucky.

[windeity]

[He'll stare at the cards he has and he calmly shuffles his as well. They have an uneven amount of cards but that's fine. It makes the game riskier. And while he shuffles, he says:]

Well to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being this is a game of stakes, the most powerful game in the world, and would blow your mind when I win, you've got to ask yourself one question...'Do I feel lucky?' [A smirk.] Well, do ya, punk?

[This is literally not the right time to quote a Clint Eastwood movie but you know what, he'll do it. And he'll flip his first card which is nine of spades.]

[parodeity]

We didn't decide aces high or low. [ dave points out, rolling his eyes, but he flips his card. ] And the implication that you're about to try to blow my head off ain't comfortin'.

[ it's the fucking five of diamonds and dave has been BETRAYED. ]

[windeity]

Aces low to change it up. [And he draws the cards into his hand.] Blowing your mind and blowing your head off are two different things, dummy. I would never actually do something like that. [Next card down is queen of clubs.]

[parodeity]

[ okay. dave has ten cards left. ten of diamonds is next because lmfao most of his red high cards were spent. ]

You're only makin' 'em low 'cause I have no other high cards, aren't you.

[windeity]

No. [Yes. And he'll swoop up the cards to add to his deck.] What makes you think I'd cheat like that?

[Flipping the queen of hearts.]

[parodeity]

Because you are a cheating asshole??

[ so why hasn't dave stopped playing.

ace of hearts. ]

[windeity]

[A great question. John will take the cards and pull them toward him. Dave, how many cards do you even have left at this point...]

An asshole, maybe, but I am not a cheating asshole. How could I possibly know what cards you have in your hand? [Other than he's good at reading tells in this kind of game and at least paying attention. It's a form of sleight of hand. He'll flip jack of clubs next.]

[parodeity]

[ okay, john, if you want to CHEAT.

perfectly deadpan and with absolutely no change in expression, dave flips over the queen of spades.

that was definitely not in his fucking hand, but he's blase about it, and it is basically just an annoyed comment on john's life choices. it's sleight of hand that's pretty much supernatural, since he shouldn't have been able to snag one of john's cards without john noticing, and yet ]

Please. It's one deck, and you know what I've played.

[ also he's at eight rn but he just pulled a dick move. ]

[windeity]

[Yeah that. He looks surprised suddenly because he thought he had all of the high cards but maybe he counted wrong?]

You make it sound like I am actually really noticing that. [He shoves the cards at Dave then since he's being a jerk. At this rate they each have like three more face down cards probably given what Dave's already flipped and so John's flipping the king of hearts.]

[parodeity]

[ of course, now that he's cheated once, dave's aware he could just. bullshit his way out of this. if he doesn't cap his skills, it's possible to win, and he's extremely aware of that. it's not hard to be faster than other people, and it's how he won at poker against some very annoying coyotes he's pretty sure were cheating, too.

he doesn't immediately flip his card, but stares at it, and debates.he hates making choices, but he makes this one with a sigh, shoulders slouching.

dave flips the ace of hearts. ]

[windeity]

[Somehow in staring at the two cards John remembers he's not. Actually doing this because he's mad. He's a little mad because everything is hard and stupid and frustrating but the game wasn't about that and he gives Dave a light grin as he picks up the two cards.

This...maybe it was a stupid idea, but he's getting it. He's getting how Dave operates and they have two cards each. He flips the eight of clubs.]

[parodeity]

[ ace of diamonds.

so it'll be his next card that determines if he loses or flips the fucking table again. does john want to hazard a bet on this. ]

[windeity]

[He does, seeing how he takes the cards and immediately flips his last which is the ten of spades. He's also just staring at Dave for a minute to see what he's going to pull next.]

[parodeity]

[ he cheats, of course.

ace of clubs, which definitely wasn't in his hand to start with and which was borrowed out of john's (replaced with the ten of hearts), so whatever. why he's cheating to lose is dave's own weird bullshit and he lets go of the final card without hesitation or any change in expression besides a raised eyebrow.

what's the favor, john? ]