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[parodeity]

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[splinten]

Tell me you didn't try to read Rose's diary.

[That seems really dumb. But okay, while Squarewave admires himself in a corner, Dirk will start, actually, with the jars of dead things. He stands up on his toes to look over them properly.]

I know we're comparing the Strider apartment across universes, but I'm reasonably confident Roxy had this shelf with mutant cats in her jars. You are so totally her kid sometimes.

[parodeity]

Of course I didn't try to read Rose's diary.

[ dave says, utilizing bullshit exact words loopholes since he definitely SUCCEEDED at reading rose's diary? also honestly dave had expected dirk to hit up the photos on the clothesline first, because they are all Terrible Selfies of thirteen year old dave so he will just. take his stay of execution there.

feel free to check out his cool fossils and WEIRDLY MUMMIFIED HAND, WHAT THE FUCK DAVE though.

otherwise: one two three four five six - yeah there are just. a bunch of selfies on that clothesline clearly developed by dave himself. ]

Dead shit's cool. Rose had gothic horror posters. [ rose is her own woman ]

[splinten]

[The selfies are coming next; it was the Roxy-ness that caught him, the familiarity that wasn't something familiar with home. He does pick up the mummified hand.]

Dead shit is weird. You have no place to criticize Rose's Gothic bent when you literally have dead things in your room.

[Seriously. He does go over to the pictures next. The first one catches his interest, of course. By the second, there's the hint of a smile. By the third the smile is really there, and before he hits six he has started laughing hysterically.

THESE ARE SO FUNNY TO HIM why is he like his brother too much]

[parodeity]

[ ok look

i mean dave has laughed at his own selfies before too so he clearly thinks they're comedic gold but damnit dirk he didn't laugh at squarewave!

(he still wants to laugh at squarewave)

his smile isn't as reluctant as he'd like it to be, but. ]

Mom has copies of some of the selfies - like, the ones I had copies to, of shit I scanned into my hard drive.

[splinten]

They are so good. Can I ask her to see them? I love them so much.

[HE LOVES THESE DUMB SELFIES let him die]

[parodeity]

You can ask to see her present. It had, like - anecdotes and shit. Mostly Rose pics and related anecdotes, but.

[ since he has like. not. a lot of hilarious childhood anecdotes, but has heaps of shit he thought roxy might like to hear about rose, which rose wouldn't care about him sharing. he'd asked. ]

I kind of miss developin' film and shit.

[ he hasn't thought about it in a while. he has the digital camera they got on floater island and takes tons of pictures with it, but it's not quite the same. there was something kind of cool about doing the development on his own. ]

[splinten]

I will.

[Dirk has a thing: he sees a problem, he thinks of a solution. So the solution comes out of his mind instantly.]

You've got a whole tower of places to pick out for a darkroom.

[Maybe it's holding the selfies that made him calm enough to suggest that. They are so dumb.]

[parodeity]

Yeah, sure, but I have no idea how the fuck to make film and the only cameras we have are digital.

[ he gestures to the non-digital camera just kind of. tossed on his fucking bed. he has never made that thing in his life. ]

You need a different sort of tool entirely if you're doing film. And, like. Film. Also helps. Also, uh, a bunch of chemical shit and special lights and stuff?

[splinten]

[Which brings him to the bed which.]

We both had bedsheets themed after webcomic villains who turned out to be part of the final boss combo. Goddammit, Paradox Space.

[Back to selfies.]

URSULA has to have videos on how to build and manufacture those things.

[parodeity]

Huh. [ he did not think to point out the bedsheets, but makes a face. damn.

also if dirk ever wanders over to the computer dave actually names his folders unlike some people. ]

Yeah, maybe. We're kinda swamped with other shit, so it's not a huge rush; I do have a perfectly serviceable camera.

[splinten]

Something when we get out of this amazing combo of terrible months.

[Dirk does glance at the computer.]

Also our browsers being our Denizens. Nice naming patterns as always.

[Dirk may not name his folders but he loves how Dave names things, so.]

[parodeity]

[ dave is liable to forget about the darkroom thing by then BUT MAYBE SOMEDAY ]

I think the browser thing was a rule across the board.

[ because. paradox space. ]

For, like, whatever inane reason. I guess because foreshadowing? Not that our lives are narratives, because that's ridiculous, but because I'm p sure p space likes to just, like, make in-jokes with itself that we all notice years later and go "why the fuck even" because p space is that dude at a party who just ain't that funny. Makes a joke and cracks himself the fuck up, but look around, dude, no one else is laughin' with you.

[splinten]

In other words, Paradox Space is the author of the narratives of our life, and killed off every plot thread that didn't fit the story it was trying to tell.

[Is what Dave appears to be saying. He gently puts the pictures back and then checks out Dave's mixing equipment? He glanced at the closet, specifically the aj, but doesn't try to go over to it.]

[parodeity]

[ thanks for leaving the closet alone dirk no one needs to go into dave's closet where he like. stashes his food and drink and other shit. why was his life this way. the mixing equipment is all well cared for, CORDS ASIDE. ]

I'm not sure about that. Some of the dead-end plot threads kinda stuck around permanently.

[splinten]

I didn't say Paradox Space was a good author. I was referring to the dead timelines.

[Or, those times Paradox Space clearly wrote itself into a very stupid corner.]

These kinds of cords are a fire hazard. Which didn't stop being a thing that was true in your tower.

[Differences between Bro and Dirk: DIRK WANTS DAVE TO HAVE NEAT WIRES INSTEAD OF DEATH TRAPS]

[parodeity]

Oh, I guess?

[ an unconcerned glance around. he literally. has never worried about fire hazards? HE HAD TO FIGURE OUT LAUNDRY and lived for a good chunk of time assuming all appliances were just meant to have weaponry. he clearly never was schooled on fire hazards. ]

I never really thought about it.

[splinten]

I did. [For some reason? Seriously why is Dirk so much better about like, SAFETY! than Bro, we may never know. And that's a dude who likes to get himself decapitated.]

It's also better for your equipment.

[parodeity]

Yeah, I know you did, you kept all my electronic shit organized at the base.

[ OR RATHER, DIRK...INSTALLED ALL OF IT...AND DAVE NEVER FUCKED IT UP? so he hid his sins for this long. ]

Because of your weird OCD thing.

[splinten]

It isn't a weird OCD thing. It is wanting to treat your equipment well, and not die in an electrical fire.

[parodeity]

If I were ever gonna die it wasn't gonna be in a fire.

[ A SHRUG. ]

Any more room-related questions?

[splinten]

Your stuff could.

[He stops, takes one last look around.]

It's bizarre we both use cinder blocks as a key component in our furnishings. [He has come to think this is really weird.]

I think with that I'm done. Thank you for showing me.

[parodeity]

I never used to think it was weird. Bro wasn't really an Ikea guy - but. Sure.

[ to showing him. dave's still standing near his closet, arms crossed. ]

Do you...want the feelings that came with livin' here, or are you good?

[splinten]

[There's a pause, because that's never something Dirk expected Dave to offer.

Breathe in, breathe out.]

If you trust me with them.

[Yes, he wants those feelings. But those feelings are important. They matter. And Dave shouldn't have to give them to someone he doesn't trust.]

[parodeity]

Yours helped me understand better.

[ understand dirk, or his view of their situation, or both. ]

I...would like you to understand. [ a frown. ] If you want. It's a lot.

[ he echoes dirk's warning, shifting uncomfortably. ]

[splinten]

I want to understand too. I'll do it.

[He knows it will be a lot. He is sure it is more than anyone should have to bear. But he wants to understand Dave, so he waits.]