parodeity | WEEK ONE: WEDNESDAY, THE POOL

[He checks them over one last time before letting them go, but then he nods.] I'll be fine. It's close enough to the truth that lyin' won't really be an issue.

[ is dirk like standing in front of him or sitting down or what, out of pure curiosity that definitely has nothing to do with anything except yeah i need to know.

dave flexes his hands, checking the job over absently. ]

[He probably would've made Dave sit and then knelt or something in front of him to do it, but you know what, let it be your choice. I willingly throw myself to your merciless jaws.

Anyway Dirk watches him to make sure that the job is okay and that Dave'll be all right.]

[ okay i guess if dirk is kneeling dave will. kind of just slide off the edge of the bed or whatever he's on the clinic looked like it had like a dozen cots and kind of incredibly awkwardly cling to dirk for some reason, burying his face in dirk's shoulder and yeah his hands are probably shaking but do not acknowledge it.

he gives absolutely zero explanation for this and he's not even sure if it will help, but after [ redacted ] he was going to have some sort of meltdown quietly and he can't do it in his room when there are two other people there.

dave wants rose, but rose just isn't here. and even if she were, he wouldn't be able to have this particular sort of meltdown in her vicinity. ]

[Oh.

Okay then.

Dirk does not ask for any explanation at all. He just wraps his arms around Dave and holds him in this extremely awkward cling, making no comment, doing nothing but holding him tight and not letting go.]

[ cool just ignore the fourteen-year-old having a small mental break. the contact helps regardless of (because of?) the source and awkward cling or no it at least reassures dave that nothing can creep up behind him. it's solid contact and he doesn't have to look at anything if his face is hidden, and dave just breathes out, hard.

breathe. ]

You don't have to do that other favor for me anymore, you would've had to come with for it to matter.

[Dirk's response is a quiet mutter from above, where he leans his head against Dave's as he holds him.]

Will there be a next time for me to come with?

[He sure as fuck hopes not, but if there is he definitely wants to go.]

I'll probably be playin' russian roulette every week.

[ :) enjoy that, dirk. ]

[WHAT THE FUCK MAN.

Dirk kinda was wondering, though. It hits his gut but he wondered, when Dave asked what his rules were, if it was because Dave was thinking about his own rules.

Dirk closes his eyes, and breathes out, slowly.]

If you want a photographer or another person, I'll be there. And if you just want to tell someone what happened, or just sit there and exchange music, I'll be there for that too.

Too risky. There were...things.

[ what the fuck does that even mean. ]

You're not gonna tell anyone I do...russian roulette, or whatever.

[ it's almost not a question this time. ]

[He expected that first part, but he sighs.] It'd help to know what things you mean.

[But that's all the objection he gives.]

I won't tell anyone about your dumbass new hobby. Don't get hurt or killed next time; we're going to run out of things to have accidents on.

Things you'd take pictures of.

[ ok dave. thanks. ]

I can't promise to pick a non-chambered bullet. Luck of the draw. Kinda thought I did this time, but fuck me, I guess. [ he is still muttering this into dirk's shoulder. ]

I'd lend you the camera but it gets stuck up if anyone else tries to hold it. [So he's the only one who can play his role, as he suspected would be the case.

Dirk isn't trying to get him out of the weird awkward hug, also.] Will it be the same day every week?

See. If you die, that goes away.

[ oh my god dave why is that what you take away from this shit ]

Dunno. Might be better to do it sooner just in case it kills me.

That was not the point. [Brat.]

You take the worst thoughts away from everythin'. Wouldn't it be better to do it later in case it kills you?

I'll probably stick to earlier.

[ just get it Over with. ]

There's...I've got contingencies. You're one of 'em.

[He does not want to be a contingency. He wants to be the one making other people be a contingency. Not cool, Dave.]

Believe it or not, I'm not scared of what happens after you die. It's the dying part I worry about.

[ yeah it doesn't feel great to not be the one making people be contingencies, does it, that is why dave prefers to be the one doing it ]

Same difference, dude.

My point is that the contingencies don't comfort me. I want you alive for you, not what you do.

[It's certain but not aggressive. He's stating it as a fact instead of something he's trying to shove on Dave. Like explaining something.]

Just... let me know before you go, okay?

Maybe.

[ not encouraging but he hasn't pulled away yet. so there's...that? he still hasn't fucking explained why he's clinging to dirk, who he still...well, doesn't love? he isn't sure if it's like, either. it's not even familiar, because there is nothing familiar about this scenario.

but he can't really ask the other people he speaks to for this sort of thing, because he is supposed to be stronger than this.

at least that illusion was already shattered for dirk. ]

Are you sure you don't want anythin' in return.

All kinds of sure, dude.

[He wants Dave safe but he knows it's something he can't get. He wants to be there for Dave but he knows it's something he has to take as it is offered to him. So he wants nothing, and keeps Dave close, and in a way relaxes into this stupid Strider cling.]

If I have somethin' to give you, even?

[ cool. they're on the floor of the clinic and - ]

We gotta get back. Curfew.

Then give it to me if you want to, or don't if you don't. No debts on this.

[Ah yes. Curfew.]

We've got a little time.

[They met at 8 and curfew is at midnight so PROBABLY they can afford to do this a little longer if needed.

Also I forgot to mention it but this emotional conversation has probably been punctuated by awkward horrorterror dust coughs.]

I wouldn't give it to you without any of this shit bein' a thing. But does that really make it a thing you do not want?

[ oh my god. great. the horrorterror dust coughs kind of cinch it. dave...pulls back, although he doesn't stand up from the floor. he fiddles with the hem of his shirt out of awkward nerves. ]

[God these awkward idiots. Dirk swallows down another cough.]

I probably do want it, given everything that's going on here and your general reticence about everything. What I'm tryin' to say is—[HACK COUGH CTHULHU PHLEGM]—there ain't a debt, at least not from my perspective. You're free to make whatever choice settles things how you'd be most comfortable with them. If that means giving me whatever,, sure, I'll take it. But if you figure you'll regret it, then we're cool without.

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