Life of Brian's good. [Life of Brian is hilarious? Judean People's Front vs the People's Front of Judea. It's so funny how the left fractures and becomes useless from in-fighting in the face of authoritarian forces.]
[ see this is why dave confuses dirk sometimes? sometimes he can just give dirk no context and dirk immediately catches on???????? and then he doesn't bother to explain his mental processes even moreso than usual.
oh well. dave will start to doodle, though he's leaning against the armrest and using his legs as like a makeshift table so. it's hard to tell what the fuck he's doing. he will set up the movie first actually though hold on. ]
Karkat? [Well. Dirk is doodling his own cookie monster masterpiece, so Dirk has no right to judge whatever Dave is doing.] I figured. I was jealous of him during the whole fiasco over Lil Cal.
[ a shrug. it's the same reason he'd have had for warning john that he had been dating karkat: a general hope that no one makes anything worse on the other party. ]
You do have the advantage on pretty much everyone else there, though.
But even so I figured you're generally super bad at pushin' people away? Like. I didn't think it mattered that I wasn't really relevant as much beyond a proxy back then, I can't see you really pushin' anyone away as such? Is it even a matter of "would have" so much as "not in your personality type"?
You were already relevant as more than a proxy, to start. Like, do you think that 'way better dude than I imagined him to be' line was meant to imply you were the same guy? You'd made yourself distinct already. So that part is wrong.
I've had approximately four friends, kinda five, my entire life. Opportunities for pushing people away have been brief at best. Back then, I probably could have only guessed if I was capable of shutting down on people. In the past year, I've learned that I really fuckin' can.
[He has no memory of this instance? He has been yelled at about trying to contain his emotions but]
Believe it or not, I was getting along with Komaeda before I decided not to have anything to do with him except in m obligations to the well-being of the crew.
Oh. Yeah. [He remembers that. Not as clearly as he could; he likes to not think too much about it. He still has awful, obsessive thoughts on that front.] I knew he was creepy. Circumstances had me talk to him, and I got the mistaken idea that he was not so fucked up he couldn't be dealt with.
[ back then, before the bombs, dave means. it wasn't enough he'd bothered to say anything to anyone, but then, he never did that so much even when it was enough. ]
I was goin' to say you don't have to like...cut people out if you don't want to, but you do, don't you?
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[ so JUDGMENTAL ]
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[ like, if he remembers at all. dave holds out a hand for a red pencil and some paper because obviously he needs to be involved in this nonsense.
how is dirk supposed to read his mind here ]
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some paper and a red pencil, because Dirk reads minds.]
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oh well. dave will start to doodle, though he's leaning against the armrest and using his legs as like a makeshift table so. it's hard to tell what the fuck he's doing. he will set up the movie first actually though hold on. ]
BTW, I think he's jealous of you so like, sorry.
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he just frowns. ]
What, why?
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[So. He was jealous. He wanted what Karkat had: Dave's trust, the opportunity to give Dave any comfort. A worthiness to love Dave.]
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[ his eyes drift over towards dirk's sketchpad and away lightning quick. nope not yet. ]
The part where I talk to you still even when we're fightin'. I think he didn't realize there've been times when I go quiet on you for a bit, too.
[ or...times he sent Less clingy texts? which was "quiet" for dave. ]
I didn't explain the differences 'cause I didn't want to get into 'em, but I figured I should warn you.
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Why do you think that needs a warning? Vantas didn't seem likely to be nasty to me, based on his texts.
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[ obviously.
(that was not obvious?) ]
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You're a really good dude, Dave. I'll be careful.
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[ a shrug. it's the same reason he'd have had for warning john that he had been dating karkat: a general hope that no one makes anything worse on the other party. ]
You do have the advantage on pretty much everyone else there, though.
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[That's good.]
You mean I'm persistent as all fuck and somehow manage to get away with it.
[Dirk is such a pushy ass.]
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[ well. ]
I guess that fits the "somehow manage to get away with it" part.
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It's physically impossible for me to shove you away at this point, so that's pretty relieving to hear.
[Dave can be released and Dirk will draw now. But he had to do that.]
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Which implies you could've back at the start. [ not a complaint so much as idle chit chat, honestly ]
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[And now they're here.]
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[ gestures to self with red pencil. ]
But even so I figured you're generally super bad at pushin' people away? Like. I didn't think it mattered that I wasn't really relevant as much beyond a proxy back then, I can't see you really pushin' anyone away as such? Is it even a matter of "would have" so much as "not in your personality type"?
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A few things.
[SO MUCH WRONG HERE]
You were already relevant as more than a proxy, to start. Like, do you think that 'way better dude than I imagined him to be' line was meant to imply you were the same guy? You'd made yourself distinct already. So that part is wrong.
I've had approximately four friends, kinda five, my entire life. Opportunities for pushing people away have been brief at best. Back then, I probably could have only guessed if I was capable of shutting down on people. In the past year, I've learned that I really fuckin' can.
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Who have you been shuttin' down on?
[ wtf????? news to him??????? ]
You did it like a grand total of once to me and when I told you to knock it off you did.
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[He has no memory of this instance? He has been yelled at about trying to contain his emotions but]
Believe it or not, I was getting along with Komaeda before I decided not to have anything to do with him except in m obligations to the well-being of the crew.
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[ what does that say about him, exactly?????
dave gets halfway through "you don't" before breaking off and frowning. ]
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[And now we're here.
Also.] What don't I?
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[ back then, before the bombs, dave means. it wasn't enough he'd bothered to say anything to anyone, but then, he never did that so much even when it was enough. ]
I was goin' to say you don't have to like...cut people out if you don't want to, but you do, don't you?
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