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[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER

consider this your warning about stairs. itll just keep happening bro. im telling you man

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

Comments

[parodeity]

So, you gonna go pose first? [ dave already has his camera out, dropping john's hand. ] We could always use more pictures to hang up.

[ false ]

[windeity]

You know you're going to run out of wall space, Dave. [But he goes like a good boyfriend and settles behind the cut-out, head suddenly hovering over the body of a wise wizard with a long white beard. Neither of them knows what will happen when Dave takes the picture...but it might be a surprise for both of them.]

[parodeity]

So buy me more walls? [ how.

but also he's snapping that picture! ]

[windeity]

So what you are saying is to buy you a bigger house. [He grins, and Dave takes the picture! It looks fine, probably.

Granted, John steps away from the photo cut-out...and now has a white beard and a wizard's hat. Congratulations kids.] Or we can add an expansion wing?

[parodeity]

No fuck you we ain't movin' - [ dave's checking the shot before he looks up at john and breaks off mid sentence, laughing. ] Well, shit. You're missing the santa suit, babe.

[windeity]

I didn't say moving. And what are you even--[Oh. Oh no. He tugs on the beard, a little "ow!" indicating the thing sure is stuck and he turns to Dave to pout.] The Santa suit got returned to the mall. Fix it!

[Or laugh, whatever. He's still trying.]

[parodeity]

Maybe there's a normal-person cutout somewhere? [ no he's still laughing sorry john ]

[windeity]

[He throws the wizard hat, but it zips right back to him.] You could help me look instead of laughing, you know! [Said as if he wouldn't do the exact same thing if they were reversed.]

[parodeity]

Dude, no way, this is photo worthy. [ he's totally? documenting it? ]

[windeity]

[...] I will make you a deal. [He's grinning, so maybe that's not a good idea.] You can take as many photos of me like this as you want. But the next one we find you have to let me take the picture.

[parodeity]

[ no what the fuck what if it's something dumb??? ] I'll give you a kiss per photo?

[windeity]

You'd do that anyway. Admit it. You would totally still kiss me with this dumb wizard beard on my face.

[parodeity]

...I will let you pick the location of said kisses? [ don't at him!!! ]

[windeity]

Nuh-uh. No kissing until you agree to take a picture behind one of these stupid cut-outs. Deal or no deal?

[parodeity]

[ nghhhh ] You don't love me anymore, do you? But fiiine.

[windeity]

I love you plenty. That's why I am making us equal. [There's a smile and he reaches for Dave's hand.] Come on. Let's keep walking. The forest is pretty on its own anyway.

[parodeity]

If you really loved me you would let me bribe you?? [ but he isn't seriously complaining here. just joking complaining. ]

[windeity]

You need to up your bribery game, dude. I am not bought that easily.

[parodeity]

[ what the fuck can he up it to!!! ] I'll blow you again? [ it doesn't help he's willing to do everything he could bribe john with anyway. ]

[windeity]

[That sounds like Dave's problem tbh, good luck figuring it out!! John, on the other hand, just kind of grins in that pleased way of his.] I think you just really want to blow me again regardless since you keep bringing it up.

[...then again...] Not that I am opposed.

[parodeity]

[ a sigh. ] I'll let you take me camping.

[windeity]

In almost-October? [Now he just sounds amused...]

[parodeity]

Did it ever occur to you maybe there's a reason i was tryin' the sexua stuff first? Also yes.

[windeity]

I assumed it was just because you liked doing sexual things with me, but I guess bribery makes sense. Can I raincheck the camping trip?

[parodeity]

[ he's stymied because yes, true, but hey?? ] Okay, first off obviously I will go camping with you whenever you want, bribery not necessary. Second off, we can raincheck that convo for later. You got a windy lead on any more photoshoots?