recollé ic inbox 3.0;

[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER

consider this your warning about stairs. itll just keep happening bro. im telling you man

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

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Comments

[parodeity]

It's not, like...a favor to me. [ dave in john's bed. he's confirming that. ]

[windeity]

[He swears softly under his breath.]

No. It's not a favor to you. It is something I am asking you for, too.

[parodeity]

Oh. [ just "oh". ] Okay?

[ jfc ]

[windeity]

[....internal shrieking.]

Okay? I...it's fine if you do not want to do that, it was just something--yeah. It's fine. Forget it, I can go back to sleeping by myself.

[parodeity]

But you just said - [ aggravated noise. ] Stop changin' your mind!

[ hello dave strider is a hypocrite ]

[windeity]

You’re the one who keeps making it weird and like I should change my mind! Also how is this any different than when you do the same to me?

[parodeity]

[ OH MY GOD ]

I'm not makin' it weird! I want to fuckin' sleep with you, god! But not if you're just doing it because of me.

[windeity]

I'm not doing it just because of you! It was never just because of you, it was for both of us and that was the whole point! [Cool, glad they're driving and just yelling at each other.]

[parodeity]

[ excuse you dave is not yelling he is just enunciating carefully in a speaking tone??? ]

You sleep fine without it! [ why can't they agree on a thing and then like

not argue about the thing they agreed on

idiots ]

[windeity]

[With exclamation points and it may as well be a Dave-version of yelling. So yeah. That's cool.]

How do you know that? Stop talking about what I do and don't do when you don't ask!

[parodeity]

Like I'm allowed!

[windeity]

[What if he just slams on the brakes and stops in the middle of an empty street to stare at him???]

What the fuck. You are blowing this out of proportion for, like, no reason!

[parodeity]

Well, so are you! [ also, immediately: ] Pull over if you can't multitask, John, christ. Or let me drive.

[windeity]

I can drive just fine! [So also, shut up!] How am I blowing this out of proportion? What did I do to blow anything out of proportion here?

[parodeity]

You - [ and what's his argument here, that he's willing to say? like, it's not like he can actually complain about john pulling back when he's doing the same damn thing, or about why, or about any of it. ] - never mind, you're right, sorry, my fault. If you can drive, let's go. We're already running behind schedule.

[windeity]

[...what if he just buries his face in his hands and muffles a loud yell.]

Jesus christ, Dave, not everything is your fault and we are not behind schedule! I can tell time, too!

[And he suddenly moves and leans over the center console to grab Dave's face.]

Do you want to sleep with me, yes or no?

[parodeity]

[ well that doesn't prove john can multitask drive?

dave's eyes go wide but thankfully john can't fucking see that and this is still stupid as fuck. ]

- Yes. [ then, licking his lips and trying to save whatever face he sure doesn't fucking have: ] We're behind my schedule.

[windeity]

Okay. Then everything else doesn't matter right now. [Because John knows there are things to talk about and he absolutely does not want to discuss them since he has no idea how to process things he's thinking. This, at least, he can handle.]

What else does your schedule say? [Once he knows what he's working with, at least, he'll drive.]

[parodeity]

[ did john let...go...why would dave be leaning into the touch again fuck off ]

You need to eat lunch.

[windeity]

[No he's still holding Dave's face and will be until he drives because John is probably crazy and this seems to work.]

I. Wait, what? I'll eat, it's fine.

[parodeity]

You wanted to know what else was on the schedule.

[ he'll apparently track when john or other people last ate, but not himself? ]

[windeity]

That can be after training, Dave...dinner and stuff with the girls, remember?

[parodeity]

That entirely bypasses lunch.

[ why is he even discussing this does he even actually care. ]

[windeity]

[...]

Okay well. When did you last eat? I know you skipped breakfast.

[parodeity]

[ okay wow unfair questions? ]

I had lunch?

[ yesterday. ]