parodeity | subnautica ic inbox 3.0;

i mean
lets talk about it in person this is stupid
unless
you want to talk about it like this???

My preference is always for in-person discussions.
But I don't mind text if it's your preference.
It's whatever you think works.

i didnt mean to say what i did
or not the way i said it
and
i dont know how to put it so
ill shut up for now
and wait

Ok. Two minutes.

[It will indeed be two minutes. And Dirk will be... trying not to let himself be a huge baby about what he knows isn't Dave saying he hates him generally but tolerates him because of his Roseness. So: melancholic, but not morose.

Fist bump for the Magister, and a general warning call of "I'm home" so if Obama wants to clear the area he can.]

[ dave's on the tv level sitting on the floor cross-legged. obama splits from his lap the second dirk calls out, but dave doesn't bother to like, relocate to the couch? he looks a little more settled than he did earlier. ]

Hey. [ and yet NO LESS AWKWARD. ]

[So smooth, so elegant. Dirk greets with equal grace.] Hey.

[He goes to sit down beside Dave? He'll retreat if Dave seems uncomfortable but. He wants to sit beside Dave if it's ok? so.]

[ that's. ok for now? he's still being awkward but it's not the type of awkward where he'll shove dirk away like he did the other day. ]

So, [ he could enter the topic of what he said but ] how's everyone else doin'?

[ ursula included, he figures, since dirk probably checked in with her. ]

They're okay. Obviously everyone was pretty unhappy with being cut off like that. For the most part, it was across the board excitement at having communication back.

[Yup. This is a great talk.]

Yeah. Figured? I mean, it's...great to have it back, and all.

[ SUPER GREAT. ]

Didn't realize how much I relied on talkin' to Rose or whatever.

[Unfortunately for Dave, with the exception of the romantic angle of his feelings towards Jake, Dirk does not pussyfoot around how he feels about people he loves.]

Yeah. I really missed talkin' to you. Or, like, just hearin' the weird things you ramble about. I didn't like the way it changed how your voice sounded either. So it's a major relief to hear you talk again.

[ THANKS, DIRK. dave goes. quiet. for a few minutes. he's probably not going to bother to address everything he has thought or is thinking, here, but that's par for the course. ]

I hated bein' around you the past few days. Sorry.

I figured.

[Dave kinda gave it away.]

Was it because. [Ugh. He swallows.] Was it because he didn't talk? [Was that it? Dirk tried to mitigate that. He tried to make noises and be careful when he flashstepped. He tried not to be a ghost, and to emote, and to show Dave he was still human. But there's a shadow and he doesn't know if he can ever get out of it.]

Or was it just not being able to talk?

Both. Neither. I couldn't always tell what you were gettin' at and I hated - guessing.

[ having to read the tiny clues desperately trying to keep up. he hated doing that, with anyone the past few days. dave hadn't even bothered trying to speak with rose. ]

I didn't want to play guessin' games. [ but yes, it was also not being able to talk. ] I don't know - it was just. Being a kid again? Not your problem.

You tried not to make me have to be a kid again.

[Dirk thinks? Dave would hit abscond but he'd also show up for things. They didn't miss movie night. Dave was tense but he also tried not to let Dirk be totally alone.]

Well, yeah.

[ obviously. he promised to show up to movie night when he agreed to those and wouldn't skip. but more than that, there was no reason to make dirk feel like crap and every reason not to do that.

it's hard to hit hard abscond when he's aware that's dirk's trigger. so he'd made himself show up and do things and exist. ]

That upsets you.

I appreciate it a lot. [He wants Dave to know that. He means it.] It isn't fair or helpful for you to have to torture yourself for me, either. Part of the agreement was you can hit abscond if you need to. Maybe we need a code or a symbol or something that will tell you when it happens, since a verbal statement didn't really work here.

I'm okay if you have to leave, bro. I just need to know you aren't leaving forever. It's... important to me, to know you're doing what you need for yourself, too.

I mean, I would've been torturin' myself one way or another. But sure. I can...abscond next time. If that's what would be best?

[ he's genuinely not sure. dave shakes his head, lets it go. ]

I missed talkin' to you, too. Let's just leave it at that?

What's best would be what hurts you the least. If it's torture either way, I guess... make the call that seems best for what you need?

[Dave wants to leave it, though. Dirk nods.]

Okay. We can leave it at that.

A'ight. [ dave breathes out slow and struggles with the temptation to tell dirk to ditch him and go hang out with people who can say genuinely they're thrilled without weird undertones.

he'd try that, but dirk would probably not accept it. so he simply drops the issue entirely. ]

Movie?

[The Rose thing. Dave didn't explain the Rose thing. Dirk watches him (his shades were off before he got down here) with brows just suggesting a frown.]

Okay. Did you mean it when you said you wanted to monopolize my time?

[ dirk would have to remind him. he forgot. ]

Uh. Yeah. I get if you...want to go anywhere else? [ a snort of laughter. ] Sorry. Out of habit.

[ talking to people and actually telling them things, he means. not like dave is ever very in habit. ]

Yeah, I worried about that. [He is being quiet, the way he gets when he's trying to work things out. It means he isn't his most open emotionally, and after a minute he realizes that.] I'm not doin' the shut down thing. Or, I don't mean to be. I just... am tryin' to make sure I fully grasp the situation, before I do something stupid like attempt mind-reading and make a bad judgement call.

You genuinely want to hang out with me, but talkin' with me about things still feels a little strange. So talkin' about the thing with me and Rose is something you'd prefer not to try right now.

Is that all correct?

The - what, no. You didn't get that still? Uh.

[ the rose thing. right. ]

You both talk like - not people. Not meanin' offense. You're all big words and stilted phrases and ridiculous explanations. If it were anyone else, it'd feel -

[ robotic? not the word he wants. ]

The thing is, I spent so long with Rose that stilted doesn't sound stilted. She's not even when she sounds it.

[Huh. Dirk can fill in the word easily. It isn't like it's the only time it's been tossed his way. But that isn't what Dave means.]

Okay. That's all that was?

It's just funny.

[ funny weird, funny hilarious. ]

The way you two are. Sometimes it makes me think I could read like old ridiculous academic texts and they'd be infused with warmth or somethin'. It was a nonsense chain of thought.

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