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[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER

consider this your warning about stairs. itll just keep happening bro. im telling you man

VOICE | TEXT | VIDEO | ACTION

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[parodeity]

[ dave rolls his eyes and gets to his feet, reaching a hand down to john. ] If you want me to keep my shirt on...

[windeity]

[He takes the hand and hauls himself up, stopping just a hair away before pressing a kiss to Dave's face.] Absolutely not.

[parodeity]

[ there's a grin and dave leans in to actually kiss john on the mouth for a second before dragging him back, managing to walk backwards without tripping fairly easily. ] You don't get to keep yours either, then.

[windeity]

I mean I wasn't planning on it. [He lets Dave lead them while walking backwards.] That is part of the exchange rate in the house.

[parodeity]

What other kind of exchange rates do we have here? [ there's more than a little amusement because what the hell. dave has to stop walking backwards to get the door, and then they're inside and he pauses to close it and eye john. ] Are shoes an eye for an eye? I don't remember signing this contract?

[windeity]

Uh. Kisses for kisses? Obviously? Keep up with the program, Dave, you signed this contract when we started dating.

[parodeity]

I don't remember signing it, but I guess those are acceptable terms. [ and also it's a reason to drop john's hand and grab his shirt instead to pull him over for a kiss. this time it's a little less short and chaste. ]

[windeity]

[He grins and immediately meets him for the kiss, arms looping over Dave's shoulders to pull him as close as possible. Maybe it was a cheap ploy to get a kiss, but he's okay with that.

It's not desperate but it's firm and certain enough.]

[parodeity]

[ cheap ploys have a certain charm. dave presses closer for a minute but then pulls back again. ] Do you wanna stay down here and watch a movie or go upstairs? [ at least he seems to have forgotten threatening to stay awake all night. ]

[windeity]

[No, let him keep holding him?? So they're standing still and John debates for a moment.]

...both? Either or I am pretty sure I am going to end up making out with you, so.

[parodeity]

[ dave just lets him debate, letting go of john's shirt and letting his hands drop to his hips instead, fingers tapping out a familiar beat. ]

Presumptuous. [ for good reason, really. ] ...I wanna go upstairs.

[windeity]

I'm allowed to be. [Especially when Dave's speaking in music and John flashes another grin.] Come on then. Upstairs. Lead the way?

[parodeity]

[ he's playing the the song john wrote for his birthday. so maybe john is allowed to be presumptuous, yes. ] A'ight.

[ this is going to be the longest trip upstairs ever because he leans in to kiss john again and is just. going to navigate them like this, it's fine, they probably won't hurt themselves TOO badly surely.

just like, a normal amount. ]

[windeity]

[Upstairs they go, occasionally missing a step and stumbling but John just laughs it off and keeps himself attached to Dave as best as possible. It's easy enough to navigate and maybe they bump into a wall but he doesn't care. He's pushing as much as Dave is pulling and steering them to their room.]

Shirt?

[parodeity]

[ hopefully neither of them has too many bruises from like, the stair railing. at least the cat has the sense to stay out of the way as her idiot owners make their way upstairs, and dave manages not to fall over although he does stop kissing john enough to say "i warned you about the stairs bro" the first time they miss a step.

then he shuts up although it's not like he isn't laughing either. john tends to make him laugh.

the question gets dave to let go and simply pull his shirt off over his head and who the fuck cares where it goes, he just tosses it aside and reaches for john's shirt instead. dave looks the same as ever except for the tattoo, and he can't go back to kissing john until his shirt is off so. ]

Your turn.

[windeity]

[He shoves Dave a little because shut up, loser, don't make him laugh harder?? But it's something comforting and funny and he's also kicking the door half-closed just because he can.

Dave's shirt is gone and he tries to move forward to kiss him again but he doesn't get far enough before Dave's grabbing him. Give him a second, he's working on it.]

Impatient. [Teasing though. Give him a moment, there goes the shirt.] Better?

[parodeity]

Yes. [ shut up he likes john shirtless and so john will get the kiss he was trying for after the shirt is gone. farewell shirt, dave doesn't give a fuck about you.

he reaches over john's shoulder to shut the door entirely because he doesn't want the cat to come and demand their attention right this second. she has a ton of toys and climbing things she will be Fine.

then he's dragging john back and knocking the back of his shin into the edge of the bedframe. ]

Ow fuck. [ against john's mouth and ow but whatever not worth stopping for. ]

[windeity]

[Thank god. He's nipping at Dave's mouth and he's content to get back to kissing, not at all bothered with the door shutting and he follows after Dave toward their bed. Or, more specifically, he follows Dave's mouth and he laughs at the retort.]

I hate our frame. [It's all he says before he settles to sit on the edge of the bed and tries to pull Dave with him.]

[parodeity]

[ john barely has to try. dave lets himself be pulled with john, opting to sit in his lap instead of on the bed, and he drapes his arms over john's shoulders. ]

I love you. [ that's not really a logical response and it's just followed by a sort of little smile as he just looks at john, because it's nice to see john happy and here and it feels okay, maybe. ] And I usually like our bed just fine when it ain't out to get me.

[windeity]

[He spreads his legs just a bit to balance the extra weight in his lap, hands settling around Dave's hips and back.]

Love you, too. [A quick kiss to the tip of his nose.] Sorry the bed's cockblocking you somehow.

[parodeity]

I wouldn't go that far. [ john doesn't seem to be less interested in making out, anyway? which is excellent since dave wants to make out, basically. he fails to help with the balancing by shoving john back onto the bed, which is probably awkward with john's feet on the ground but dave doesn't. care. he kisses down john's neck to his shoulder instead. ]

[windeity]

Maybe not. [It's huffed out a little as soon as Dave's mouth starts moving. He's flexible enough to bend backwards and he takes Dave with him. He shifts his legs enough though and keeps him on top while his hands idly run over Dave's back just because he can.]

[parodeity]

You're stupid hot. [ and there's the lowkey murmuring ramble starting up that he does. a lot of the time, frequently when it isn't helpful. ] Like, damn, Egbert. We could scramble eggs on your chest. I'm not sure it would be hygenic, but we could. Just probably could not sell them, on account of health code violations.

[ this commentary is offered as his fingers trail down said chest. thanks, dave. ]

And then I would be fined and it would be tragic. If we did sell the eggs and open a food truck, I mean. Food cooked courtesy John Egbert being smokin'.

[ john chose to date this. ]

[windeity]

[He's just kind of shivering under Dave's hand but also he grins in spite of himself.]

Have you thought about cooking eggs on me a lot or what?

[parodeity]

Shut up. [ so yes? yes. he has thought about this before. dave is a moron. ] It's not my - well it is my fault you go around shirtless all the time, actually.