parodeity | subnautica ic inbox 2.0;

I didn't text you as much because I figured it was better to let you text me and thereby avoid driving you away with my desperate need to have your time and attention.

[Why this. God he is so. Pathetic.]

[ all right, dave...is not sure what to think about that since his friends all dealt with his clingy texting habits by literally just walking away or x'ing out of windows until they went back to deal with him and never expressed anything other than 1) amusement 2) annoyance or 3) psychoanalyzation. none of them ever got driven off by the whole. texting too much thing. ]

Why...would that be a thing.

[ he can't comprehend this one? ]

I mean, I guess I have avoided askin' you to spend time with me before after like, occupying too much time in a row or like tried to not text you so you'd spend time with other people, but.

Because havin' to deal with too much Dirk Strider is a hell I made for myself and which I wouldn't wish on anyone.

[Because he hates being around himself so CLEARLY DAVE WILL TOO]

I'm not... great to be around. My personality is pretty much unbearable.

Dirk. You can be as clingy as you want. I don't care?

[ the whole current touching issue aside. ]

The times I've wanted to fuck off alone I've said so. But they're...not really the norm?

I... understand the probably truth behind that, and I'll try to act it out a bit more.

[God, he's so dumb. He. Clears his throat.]

But yeah. That's... my stuff, with regards to thinking I'd be better off living with you. You shouldn't consider that an obligation by any means. I can definitely adapt however necessary to get by and you already do a lot for me. But that's how it is.

We can make it a rule if you think that'd help.

[ it's a casual offer as he continues just kind of staring at dirk while holding his hand and. sitting too close what the fuck dave why do you insist on making things so awkward? at least he isn't like smooshing his cheek into a hug here i guess??? that's kind of an improvement??? it's not really an improvement. but. okay.

it feels a bit like standing on the precipice of some free fall guaranteed to cause his own death, trying to decide what the right thing to do or say is.

rose was probably bullshitting the fortune thing. ]

...Okay?

[ it comes out more like a question than a finality. ]

[Dirk is sitting here, holding his brother's hand, awkwardly up in a tree unsure what Dave is saying. He always has to read into every line and he... doesn't know? He doesn't quite know.]

Okay to... what thing?

[Making it a rule?]

[ ok the awkwardly up in a tree thing is entirely dirk's fault dave would have picked like, the ground, what the fuck dirk. or a volcano??????? ]

Okay, you can organize my cords.

[ that wasn't what he meant to say, but it will. work. whatever. ]

[In the tree, only the leaves can see their shame.]

Uh.

[That's. Okay. Breath.]

Would you also be managing my sock drawer?

You can't be trusted to manage your own sock drawer.

[ there is probably no way he's gotten away with not discussing his own feelings on the entire thing but let him dream for like three minutes. ]

You will not take my toe socks away from me, bro.

[it won't be a full three minutes the kid gets here]

Do you mind when I call you that?

[ hang on we need to detour into random fucking questions with dave strider. ]

Bro. I mean, is it ok when I call you that.

[That one comes suddenly and Dirk is definitely caught off guard.]

No. Do you?

No. I kind of like it but then I get worried that you wouldn't like me callin' you what I always called him?

[ but then he proceeded to just never ask. until right now.

..................

for the god of time he could maybe work on his timing. ]

No, I... want to completely obscure him in every way possible. Bro being used for me makes me feel like I'm more of your brother than he is.

[playing dave's brother sweepstakes and PLAYING TO WIN]

I meant if you mind it when I call you bro.

Oh. So I should...not do the thing where I go to say it but then flip to dude or man or something else.

[ GOOD TO KNOW... ]

He only ever really used it in the context of "bro roof now".

Yeah, you can not do that.

[Dave says that phrase, and there is that tension that Dave can feel by a hand, something that eases a moment later.]

That won't be in my list of phrases. Ever.

That's the only context wherein it would bother me that you called me bro.

[ so. he doesn't mind it. ]

Okay, cool.

[A pause. The three minutes (however much time) grace is up.]

It might be worth discussing the tower thing from your end.

Do we gotta?

[ the complaint isn't serious because he knows...they probably do have to. the question is where to start. ]

What about it do you wanna know? [ when in doubt: just ask dirk what he wants to know. ]

We're not obliged to. Doing it, however, is probably a mistake.

[Since, you know. Feelings.]

We can start with how it helps you. Or, uh, if it doesn't.

It was always goin' to help me. I knew that from the start?

[ he just super...still considers it extremely selfish. but maybe it's okay if dirk is being selfish too? and maybe (definitely) dave is extremely tired. ]

That was never an issue. Like, it would definitely be way better for my mental and physical well-bein'. I knew that.

Right. [There's a pause.] Okay, let's try this again. What part of your feelings on this do you want to talk about least?

[there we go]

The selfish part.

[ THAT he can answer immediately. ]

Or the bein' afraid part. They're tied for last place. Like there's a country fair for the best sheep and they're just scrawny fuckin' things with wool all over the place and not the nice curly soft kind but kinky shit that grows in patches.

As someone who has never seen a sheep in my life, I'll take them both.

[The metaphor is hilarious, honestly. Why is Dirk so amused by it.]

It's selfish because it could hurt people, and it's frightening because you're worried I'll leave.

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