...okay, well, that explains a few things but I am not sure I want to ask further. [He leans over to open the door.] But she got kind of mad that I was asking.
Understandably. I’d have probably laughed in your face. [ dave stops john when he leans over mostly because he’s wanted to for a while. it’s?? frustrating to have someone you like in your space like that and not being allowed to touch but he’s (not really) kind of sure it’s okay to reach out to turn john’s face towards him so dave can kiss him instead of the usual door opening?
yeah it’s more hesitant and less smooth but whatever ]
- because it wouldn’t have been your business and also why.
…oh. There's a very slow smile because it's kind of sweet and it's also weirdly relaxing to know Dave's a little hesitant, too. He uses a hand to brace himself on Dave's seat and he returns the gesture for a moment before he settles for staring where he thinks he's pinpointed Dave's eyes are behind his shades.]
Given some of the other things I remember saying about you, I kind of have to wonder if I was just mad I didn't have my version of you around.
[ how long until john bothers to ask dave to take off the shades. dave makes zero moves to let john open he door though he isn’t stopping it; the hand that had turned john’s face towards him slides to rest at the side of john’s neck and yeah, he’s nervous. still terrified.
but john’s right here so it’s maybe okay. ]
I didn’t get mad mostly. I just missed you. Rose unfairly got to see you first.
[Soon...but he's letting Dave's hand rest on his neck and he's practically nose to nose with him. They can do this, at least.]
You mean when she showed up during my fight with Jack? I do remember that. It's how I won. [But.] I definitely missed you, too. I bitched a lot at Jade about making the ship go faster and it never happened.
[ cool he just kind of wants to kiss john again but instead he leans forward to rest his forehead against John’s which still isn’t normal and lets his eyes drift shut. ]
Pretty sure we both needed the two of you. [ he and rose and jade and John. ] Things were...all unbalanced.
[That's fine. He's comfortable, kind of, (the way he's leaning in his seat isn't that comfy) but he's not going to move either.]
I think part of it was that I was upset it was bird-you and not you-you, and if I had to guess maybe I was mad at Jade for treating him like you. I don't know. It is hard to say what fifteen year old me was thinking beyond being apparently really lonely and probably in the middle of puberty. [Shrug.] "You are the most piss poor substitute for a best friend a guy ever had. I can't wait to meet up with the real Dave again. That way we can all go back to the awesome status quo of pretending you never existed in the first place." It was probably a douche-y thing for me to say to him but I apparently didn't care since I was hallucinating or something. And then I fell asleep in the driveway.
The point is that I think I was also pretty miserable without you guys. Three years was way too long and I know it's not Jade's fault it took so long but...if fifteen year old me then was like fifteen year old me now then logic was dumb anyway.
If it helps, you’re the only version of you I want. In any capacity I mean. The guy who remembers the same things as me and didn’t the same things and...it’d be impossible not to care about other iterations of you but it wouldn’t be the same. So.
Sounds like what I said to Davesprite back then. [But that's good. He'll lean in to kiss him again even though he keeps it brief.] I still think it's cool that we found each other again though.
[ WHAT IF HE STRANGLES JOHN. there's a noise somewhere between a laugh and an annoyed groan like "oh my god you're impossible". ]
Kinda? You always lean all the way over me to get the door. I regret telling you this already. Remind me never to tell you anything about wanting to kiss you ever again.
[ well. like. this is an excellent way to shut dave up? congratulations john found something that works. kind of works. is working currently, anyway, although there's a surprised noise before he leans into it.
the angle is probably way better for dave than john who is in awkward leaning limbo but dave doesn't care about that immediately so. ]
[Doing his best: a John Egbert story. Still he's not pulling away for once and he's settled for kissing him, leaning into his space and carefully figuring out how to work his mouth over Dave's.
Granted this works for a few minutes before John's hand on the seat slips and he topples, mouth ripping away from Dave's and hands scrambling not to fall directly into his lap which means grabbing at the seat and sitting upright instead.]
...[What if he just kind of starts laughing instead because please kill him.]
Smooth. [ i mean that was sort of dave's fault for choosing to start this at the most Awkward angle known to mankind but he's like. leaning back in his seat now and just kind of amused. ] This was maybe not the best idea.
First flight, apple pancakes, the bunny from the box, ice skating. [These are apparently all times John thought about kissing Dave and came close to it.] I do not know. I just felt like it. You just...said some things or did some things and I realized I really liked you. That's all.
Waltzing on the roof, of course, escaped this list somehow. I need to up my game. [ although he admits like a half second later: ] I genuinely wasn't comin' on to you with that.
I know. You just wanted a dance partner and you got me instead. [...but there's another sly grin.] Does that mean you were coming onto me those other times?
No. [ again, opting for honesty here. ] I never let myself come onto you on purpose, so when it happened it was the usual accidental bullshit a lot of people get from me, maybe to...greater degrees.
[ he doesn't specify that it's because "you're kind of super straight" since yeah. ]
...I was at work the other day but I didn't mean much by it other than you started it and I was damned if I wasn't gonna finish it.
Oh. [..well this got awkward. Better bumble the fuck through it.] ...I didn't say anything for a while because I wanted to make sure what this was wasn't misreading things from you or from myself. We've been friends for a really long time and I didn't want to think this was just a friends thing and not me wanting you on a whole other level.
[...] I kind of figured out that it was something more than friends when I spent a month working on your birthday present and it turned into a love song. And maybe I was kind of unsure what it meant to have feelings for you but here we are. Flirting with you got to be really, really dangerous because I wasn't sure I could stop after a while and then I guess I just decided I did not want to. And it's...I kind of want you to come onto me on purpose now? [Sigh.] So that is when I figured out the thing I wanted was dating.
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yeah it’s more hesitant and less smooth but whatever ]
- because it wouldn’t have been your business and also why.
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…oh. There's a very slow smile because it's kind of sweet and it's also weirdly relaxing to know Dave's a little hesitant, too. He uses a hand to brace himself on Dave's seat and he returns the gesture for a moment before he settles for staring where he thinks he's pinpointed Dave's eyes are behind his shades.]
Given some of the other things I remember saying about you, I kind of have to wonder if I was just mad I didn't have my version of you around.
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but john’s right here so it’s maybe okay. ]
I didn’t get mad mostly. I just missed you. Rose unfairly got to see you first.
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You mean when she showed up during my fight with Jack? I do remember that. It's how I won. [But.] I definitely missed you, too. I bitched a lot at Jade about making the ship go faster and it never happened.
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Pretty sure we both needed the two of you. [ he and rose and jade and John. ] Things were...all unbalanced.
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I think part of it was that I was upset it was bird-you and not you-you, and if I had to guess maybe I was mad at Jade for treating him like you. I don't know. It is hard to say what fifteen year old me was thinking beyond being apparently really lonely and probably in the middle of puberty. [Shrug.] "You are the most piss poor substitute for a best friend a guy ever had. I can't wait to meet up with the real Dave again. That way we can all go back to the awesome status quo of pretending you never existed in the first place." It was probably a douche-y thing for me to say to him but I apparently didn't care since I was hallucinating or something. And then I fell asleep in the driveway.
The point is that I think I was also pretty miserable without you guys. Three years was way too long and I know it's not Jade's fault it took so long but...if fifteen year old me then was like fifteen year old me now then logic was dumb anyway.
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So, I've kinda wanted to do that for a while?
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Kinda? You always lean all the way over me to get the door. I regret telling you this already. Remind me never to tell you anything about wanting to kiss you ever again.
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the angle is probably way better for dave than john who is in awkward leaning limbo but dave doesn't care about that immediately so. ]
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Granted this works for a few minutes before John's hand on the seat slips and he topples, mouth ripping away from Dave's and hands scrambling not to fall directly into his lap which means grabbing at the seat and sitting upright instead.]
...[What if he just kind of starts laughing instead because please kill him.]
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Smooth. [ i mean that was sort of dave's fault for choosing to start this at the most Awkward angle known to mankind but he's like. leaning back in his seat now and just kind of amused. ] This was maybe not the best idea.
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[ you lost him, john. ]
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[ you can't just ask people why they wanted to kiss you probably AND YET ]
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First flight, apple pancakes, the bunny from the box, ice skating. [These are apparently all times John thought about kissing Dave and came close to it.] I do not know. I just felt like it. You just...said some things or did some things and I realized I really liked you. That's all.
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Waltzing on the roof, of course, escaped this list somehow. I need to up my game. [ although he admits like a half second later: ] I genuinely wasn't comin' on to you with that.
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[ he doesn't specify that it's because "you're kind of super straight" since yeah. ]
...I was at work the other day but I didn't mean much by it other than you started it and I was damned if I wasn't gonna finish it.
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[...] I kind of figured out that it was something more than friends when I spent a month working on your birthday present and it turned into a love song. And maybe I was kind of unsure what it meant to have feelings for you but here we are. Flirting with you got to be really, really dangerous because I wasn't sure I could stop after a while and then I guess I just decided I did not want to. And it's...I kind of want you to come onto me on purpose now? [Sigh.] So that is when I figured out the thing I wanted was dating.
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