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[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER

consider this your warning about stairs. itll just keep happening bro. im telling you man

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Comments

[windeity]

[...ouch. Okay, well...John's just going to pretend that wasn't a thing and looks away, focused on the houses instead of the fact that he's not sure what to do with his hands now.]

I would agree with that. Anybody can set up something straight out of a box but it takes talent to throw stuff together in a huge display. That's why I'm excited to see the last block.

[parodeity]

[ look. that was definitely cruel but dave is at least trying to rein himself in and that means trying not to get carried away and doing something stupid like forming expectations or whatever and jfc he was pretty stupid to ask for that second kiss. on the other hand he’d asked for it because he’d figured it was a one time thing or very well might be, so maybe it wasn’t stupid? except now he knows what it’s like so that’s. whatever that is.

he smirks and it’s actually passable because he shifts purely into relying on his acting skills to try to drag things back to normal and away from weird questions or anything pointing to how fucking insecure all of this is making him, waiting for some judgement he doesn’t even know is for sure coming ever. limbo could last for eternity and he really has to acclimate to that possibility. ]

So that’s a guarantee there’s no subpar displays on the last street?

[windeity]

[Cruel is a good word for it, maybe, and John isn’t as good of an actor as Dave so it takes a few moments to gather himself as he finishes his cider and tosses the cup into his sylladex for later. He slips his hands into his pockets after that and keeps his eyes on the houses and displays.

Since he can’t tap into Dave’s head he doesn’t know what he’s thinking and he again thinks Dave was placating him. He’s aware he’s overly afffectionate sometimes but maybe he moved too fast again. It’s why he asked for time. But it’s okay. They can go back to being normal today.]

Absolutely. You can see some of their lights from like six streets over. It’ll be cool. You ready?

[parodeity]

Maybe. [ he has to pull out his camera but he doesn’t focus it on john for once, wondering if maybe he needs to dial it back on that, too. john kind of already puts up with a lot of bullshit from dave and it maybe isn’t helping things to just keep up his natural inclination to cling. maybe he’s the cause of all the mixed signals he gets so just...

act like a normal person, strider. he fucks with the camera settings again and nods. ] A’ight, let’s go.

[ his hands are cold but it’s whatever and looking at the lights through the camera lens makes him remember talking to James earlier. mental note: send these pictures to the guy later. ]

[windeity]

[Act like a normal person is good advice for both of them. He keeps his eyes on the street and pretends not to notice Dave is focusing his camera at the lights and they don’t talk as they walk down the street. It’s bright and elaborate with huge set ups and structures and pretty much things John could never dream of building.

It’s hard not to smile because it’s incredible. But he’s letting Dave capture the pictures and keeps his hands firmly in his pockets, also glancing at the sky a little. At least it isn’t snowing.]

[parodeity]

[ dave has an easier time not smiling but he usually does. almost every part of him wants to turn and take the picture of john with an awed expression he’d said he wanted (its easy to picture even without turning) but he...does not. it’s almost physically exhausting but no, he’s in deep enough and he needs to stop actively making shit worse for himself. don’t look. look at the lights instead, or some of the couples and families wandering around. that kid over there looks awed and it’s so much less than what he wants to frame in the lens but he takes the picture anyway.

these shots are going to end up being useless but the camera gives him something to do so he keeps taking pictures he’ll delete later anyway, none of the angles working exactly how he wants.

some he ends up deleting immediately, working with digital today, but whatever.

the lights are pretty. be normal. rose might like pictures of the show later and James might too, even if it isn’t dave’s best work. ]

[windeity]

[He’s moving slow to take it all in and give Dave time to take pictures, sniffling a little against the cold even as they walk and a small flurry of snow swirls behind him. He points to a house with a mini carnival set up, a five foot ferris wheel of lights and Christmas songs playing in time, little elves and woodland creatures scattered and working overtime. ]

I think this one is my favorite. [Just for something to say.]

[parodeity]

[ tbh if john is reacting to the cold dave has to be freezing his ass off but for once he neglects to bitch about it. he just automatically takes a shot of the pointed-out display. ]

It's pretty busy. I can see why you'd be into it. [ because he wouldn't find it boring? ]

[windeity]

Yeah. I love this kind of stuff. I didn’t want to come check it out without you though so...thanks for coming with me. [He finally looks at him again and smiles.] I think it was worth it.

[parodeity]

[ dave is still looking through the camera lens at the displays, and he's at least well-controlled enough that the tension he feels isn't immediately visible. not to most people, anyway? he just sort of nods, humming and continuing to focus most of his attention on trying to get at least a few shots that don't totally suck. ]

You know I'll go with you to whatever you want. [ shit. wait. was that being a normal person? it's hard to tell since he'd say that to pretty much any friend. ] I'm glad you're enjoying yourself.

[windeity]

[He tilts his head then.] Are you not? [Was this another thing Dave only said yes because John wanted him to after all?]

[parodeity]

[ trap question. dave does look over at john finally, though, although the camera doesn't turn with him. ]

...I don't know. [ or he does know, and that's a problem, but. ] I love hanging out with you, and you know this. That's not, like, the issue.

[windeity]

Then what’s up? [He doesn’t mind that Dave’s camera stays in one spot and instead he’s just curious what’s going on in that pretty blonde head of his.]

[parodeity]

[ .........................

but that would mean actually sharing what's in his head.

dave's fingers are by now fucking freezing and he taps them on the camera edges, frenetic motion. ]

...I already said we don't have to talk about it ever again. [ i.e.: he is not sure how to say "yo my head feels a little messed with and i have no clue how to react to you sometimes or what is still okay" in a way that doesn't seem...pressuring. how do people handle this bullshit beyond just opting to not? ] So it's not really important.

[windeity]

[There's a frown.]

Dave, come on. It's fine? Like...it's whatever, if it is bothering you I would like to know how I can fix it since I brought you out here. But don't say it's not important, okay? It is.

[parodeity]

You don't need to fix anything. [ except he actually remembers that he told john he was working on asking for certain things, and he's proceeded to...attempt to do that with other people and give up about two steps in to "hey i don't like x can you not do it" when they ignore the request. it's the same rut of not bothering to take step one after failing so many times in a row. ]

I just, [ hm ] It's not like it's not my own damn fault, but I don't know if I can like...

[ more vague hand gestures. ]

It's not really okay to talk about. I promised you time and I'll deal. Don't worry about it.

[windeity]

I don't understand. [Not entirely, not really.] I know what I said but I...this wasn't supposed to be about you just dealing with it. That's not fair to you either.

[parodeity]

[ dave runs a hand through his hair, breathing out slow. ]

...I'm fuckin' this up. I fucked it up. Shit. Can we just...forget I ever mentioned it? You're chill, seriously, just...don't sweat it? If we want to talk "fair" I never should have brought it up. I'm sorry.

[windeity]

[...]

Put the camera away and come here for a second. [What in the fuck is going on, he sure doesn't know, but it's not hard to read between the lines after months (years, lifetimes) of knowing how Dave operates.]

[parodeity]

[ ...he doesn't immediately comply but it takes about a minute before he capitulates so that's not, like, any better than immediately really? ]

[windeity]

[Once Dave's in front of him there's a pause because well. Now he wonders if this idea is just going to make things worse but Dave's freaking out about something while playing it cool and he's not going to ask what it is...but with his hands free he shifts to take both of Dave's hands in his and standing up on his toes to kiss his forehead instead.]

Don't freak out on me yet, okay? [It's mumbled, but he's not interested in forcing Dave to talk when he doesn't want to.]

[parodeity]

[ oh. he goes still but he...

maybe doesn't freak out? he's obviously tense now that john's holding his hands and can feel that (his hands are still col as fuck) but. ]

...You mess with my head. [ and that's maybe just 90% of what having a crush is but even so. ]

[windeity]

[Oh. Oops.]

Not on purpose. Sorry. I don't really know what that means, but I'm not really interested in mind games. [He's not quite 100% sure they're talking about the same thing.]

[parodeity]

[ ...well ok look he just. ]

I like you too much to keep doing the flirting thing, okay? Or all the handholding. You need to give me time to get over it first.

[ he’s pretty sure he already said “i like you” though actually he just told John he was into him but semantics. ]

[windeity]

[...wait.]

--get over it. [Ah. Of course.] So you want to just...stop. Even though you like me. [Two and two are not making four currently and he's giving Dave a very level look.]