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[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER

consider this your warning about stairs. itll just keep happening bro. im telling you man

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[parodeity]

[ somewhere out there is bro’s body, dave thinks. he remembers lowas most strongly because of that. but he relaxes a hair even if there’s something sad about the way he holds himself. he doesn’t know what to do with remembered john, who still doesn’t remember. but he tugs at john’s hand. ]

Want to go outside?

[windeity]

[He doesn't have an answer and he seems to be a little wary of going anywhere. It's a dream. He knows it's a dream and yet he remains fairly nonverbal. He doesn't let go of Dave's hand and he doesn't try to pull away, but he glances out the window and eventually nods.

Dave seems to want to go outside, so they can go outside.

It's weird knowing this is his and his nightmares are shaped by things he remembers and things he doesn't remember just yet. Is this even a nightmare anymore? Things changed because someone showed up. But he's not remembering fast enough. He has no idea if he ever will remember fast enough for this.

It doesn't really dawn on him that he's still holding Dave's hand because he's more curious and unsure of the world outside of the treehouse door, but in the same form of reckless abandon he's taken lately, he heads for the door and pulls them both out, temporarily falling toward the ground before the breeze sweeps through and they fly to a safe touchdown.]

[parodeity]

You still can’t fly. [ dave has automatically started to slow his own descent, but he lets the breeze take over. he doesn’t drop john’s hand even though he thinks maybe he should. it’s weird but not weird to him to look out at the half-remembered lowas. ]

My first memory of this place was when Terezi called me up while I was here. You weren’t around.

[windeity]

Because I was on the planet of eye-searing colors? What'd she want? [It's small and conversational but he's getting a better look at his half-remembered planet.]

[parodeity]

...To check in on me, mostly. It wasn't a huge thing. She just thought things that weren't true.

[windeity]

She must have talked to you a lot, huh? Kind of like how Vriska talked to me.

[He's a little more verbal now that they're outside. As they begin to walk he's keeping a hold of Dave's hand because he knows what'll happen if he lets go. For now he seems to be mostly flickering but staying the same age at least.

Dave will notice that more details slowly begin to fill in the longer they're here. Rivers of oil begin to crop up along with a few paths and hills. The mushrooms change to the neon turquoise color and trees grow taller and remain leafless. Rocky mountains appear, too, and more fireflies flicker above their heads, trapped under the clouds.]

...the main salamander village is that way.

[parodeity]

I couldn’t remember what your consorts were.

[ quietly. maybe it was a bad idea because the fireflies make him sad when he remembers a million lights in the sky and whatnot had to be the first godtier death out of all of them. but John is flickering less.

dave laces their fingers together and tries to pretend he isn’t terrified. ]

They had a thing...about us. We ignored it I think.

[windeity]

Huge, yellow salamanders. [He remembers them now. He doesn't know what happened with the fireflies, doesn't know what Dave remembers at all but he flickers less even if he's still trying to float away.

He doesn't pull back either and allows their hands to stay joined together for the time being.]

What kind of thing do you mean?

[parodeity]

Competition. Who was stronger? They didn’t get that you always were. Not at first.

[ a shrug. ]

And I never wanted to beat you anyway. I just wanted to keep pace enough I could help.

[windeity]

...the salamanders? [He looks genuinely confused and not picking up that Dave means something else entirely.] I don't get it, why would that matter? And...it doesn't count since I use hammerkind. Of course I'm going to be a little stronger but that sort of means jackshit at this point. You're a way better fighter than I am.

[parodeity]

[ - he laughs, actually. ]

You're the hero, Egbert.

[windeity]

[A flicker.]

Uh. No, not really. [There's an awkward smile.] I think a hero is a lot more than whatever I am, dude.

[parodeity]

[ he sounds sixteen or thirteen or maybe eighteen when he says: ]

You're everythin' I always wanted a hero to actually be.

[ not a hero like bro was, but the kind that didn't make him hate the concept. ]

[windeity]

[There's something he doesn't quite know how to grasp in that sentence, and he takes a small breath to try and process that.]

I...have no idea what that really means, Dave. [And somehow it makes him grip Dave's hand tighter.] You're confusing me with the me that I was, and I have no idea if I can be something like that.

[parodeity]

No, it's who you are now, too.

[ it's quiet but emphatic. ]

You're...a good person. You care about people. You know right from wrong. You don't...leave people behind.

[windeity]

Why the fuck would I ever want to leave someone behind? [It's more than that though. Do those things really make up a hero?

He doesn't get to say much though because soon enough ahead of them John and Dave will spot...well. Another John. It's the John from memory in his wise guy slimer suit, thirteen years old and wielding a hammer. Not far behind him is a sixteen year old John in his godtier outfit with a different hammer that isn't visible to them. John doesn't know what it is, but it has to be stronger. Right now it's a gray outline of something, but the wind's behind him and he looks confident and assured.

And eighteen year old John finds himself back in his pajamas and dropping back to the ground without being able to float anymore, hand almost jarring loose from Dave's as he lands.]

...you're still afraid I'll leave again. [It's meant to be a statement, but it's a question.]

[parodeity]

...I know what life is like without you there.

[ his grip is way too tight. john's still stronger; he can pull back. but dave's knuckles are white from his own grip and his lips are a thin line as he looks over at the other johns. ]

I spent too many years missing you. And - [ a shrug. ] I've lost too many people who still exist but may as well be smoke and shadow. I don't know if I'm afraid you'll leave. You never quite did that.

[ his gaze shifts, inscrutable behind his shades. ]

- but the choice might not be yours, and that terrifies me.

[windeity]

...I am not saying you have to accept it, because that is kind of bullshit. I should have a choice in if I'm going to stay or go. But I still think I would have a hard time not wanting to be around you even if I forgot who we are.

[...there's a lot more to say, especially given another John seems to pop up. Thirteen this time in a stupid bowler hat. The version of himself from his thirteenth birthday.]

Can you do me a favor? [He doesn't wait for a yes or a no.] I need you to wake up.

[parodeity]

I'd do anything you asked.

[ calmly. although he frowns. ]

...but the only way I've been able to wake myself up has been...like last time, or completing a memory. And I only - I only have so many memories of here.

[windeity]

...that. Is really dangerous, Dave. [Doing anything he asked. But he appears confused for a moment.]

Like last time. Where we had to. Right. [An inhale.] So it would be easier for me to wake us up is what you are saying.

[parodeity]

- No. Let's try somethin' else.

[ not...like dave did last time. and he rolls his eyes behind his shades, tugging on john's hand and letting go for a second, turning to face john and put a hand to his shoulder. ]

You wouldn't ask me to do anything terrible. Anyway - just...let's think this through. Nothin' is attacking us, we have time. Where are you right now?

[windeity]

[He watches Dave's hands, eyes darting to one of the other Johns.]

...I'm not sure. LOWAS?

[parodeity]

[ - okay don't take this weird john but dave will move and put a hand to either side of john's face, directing john's attention fully to him. ]

Yes, but no. Where are you right now? Tell me.

[windeity]

[He doesn't seem to think it's weird but he's also still focused on the other things happening. Dave is in front of him. Sixteen year old memory John has a cyclone in his hand. Thirteen year old John just put on a clever disguise.

They're all technically him, but at what point are they him and what point are they better than him?]

A memory. [Not. Quite.] A dream?

[parodeity]

Close.

[ he's trying to get john to ignore the other versions of himself and focus on not that. dave kind of sighs, and lean closer to take up more of john's line of sight. ]

If this is a dream, where are you right now?