subnautica ic inbox 4.0;

[parodeity]

TELEPATHY | TEXT | VOICE | VIDEO | ACTION

Comments

[splinten]

Should I bring him to them?

[The tower of Strider solitude etc etc]

[parodeity]

Yeah. He can play with their cats if you really want, too?

[ technically rose has been to the tower that one time when dave had to sit on her to keep her from going into the ocean before dirk moved in but ]

[splinten]

Socializin' is probably a thing that's a thing. How is he with Obama and Snoop?

[a pause]

And our family rappers.

[parodeity]

Obama's in hidin'. He liked watchin' Snoop and the rabbit rays swim around, and...

[ well ]

Squarewave got a little too excited and rapped a bit too loud at 'im.

[splinten]

[Oh lord.] Did he scare Macklemeow. He's only used to seagulls and they don't give a fuck.

[parodeity]

He got hella hissed at and I think his feelings were hurt? He may need lessons on like. How to interact with a tiny cat. And also Obama.

[ SQUAREWAVE PROBABLY SCARED OBAMA, TOO ]

[splinten]

Teaching him how to interact with Obama might be a lost cause. I'll talk to him about Macklemeow.

[Squarewave is an idiot. A loud, well-meaning, hilarious idiot.]

Maybe Wiz can help keep Squarewave out of trouble with them by distracting him if it comes to it. Don't want to hurt the poor dude's feelings.

[parodeity]

Sounds like a plan. I think at least the Magister doesn't mind 'im, but the Magister is actually well adjusted and used to shenanigans.

[ a rapbot is fine with him? ]

All else fails you can charge 'im with babysittin' the fish to distract him.

[splinten]

Haha, yeah. Dude's really just like a puppy. As long as he has somethin' to play with, he's happy.

[Dirk never regrets Squarewave. Squarewave was a great decision.]

Movin' out to live alone did not end up as advertised.

[parodeity]

You know it ain't the same thing as that.

[ living with people or living with robots and pets, even if dave treats the pets like people. ]

[splinten]

Yeah, because I can actually put up with it without requirin' a two hour cooldown period at the Aurora on a regular basis. Are you saying it isn't nice to have a full tower like this? At this rate we could be our own sitcom.

[Dirk likes it.

Flicking that feather for kitten]

[parodeity]

I didn't say that. I just said it's basically more or less what was advertised, or at least the general plan eventually? I dunno, it ain't like I didn't move the Magister out immediately or anything.

[ he shifts, arms going around one knee pressed to his chest when dirk mentions the aurora cooldown periods. ]

I dunno about sitcoms, though. We'd need zany neighbors and I don't feel like gettin' any.

[splinten]

[Dirk notices it and the timing.]

You okay, bro?

[parodeity]

Yeah.

[ his eyes track the kitten, who flops over on his back doing an accidental tumble backwards in an attempt to get the feather. before dirk can freak, the kitten gets back up and pounces again. kittens are pretty resilient in pursuit of feathers. ]

Why d'you ask? [ he looks away from the unfortunately named macklemeow, eyebrows raising. ]

[splinten]

Oh thank fuck he's okay.

[....Dirk recovers himself after this, a rather blatant moment of cat-related panic. He clears his throat.]

Why I asked is I wasn't sure, after I said it, that the Aurora thing didn't bother you maybe. I know there was that thing with Karkat and wanderin' off on his own. I wanted to check whether or not there was a similar concern here.

[parodeity]

They overbalance themselves a lot. Cats, I mean. Even the adult ones. [ he's spent. a fair amount of time with cats since they got cloned to hell and back. he hangs out with rose regularly.

it isn't what dirk asked. ]

I don't know? I don't think so. I know you can handle yourself. [ though the auror, where reapers have been known to hang out, is a questionable place to do it. ] I'm glad it's not the option you take anymore?

[ the last part wasn't asked for and didn't technically have to be offered, but it's one of dave's hit-and-miss drive-by attempts at honesty. ]

[splinten]

Yeah. Yeah, of course. It's a mental sleight of hand or somethin'. I know that they're incredibly durable and have a wicked sense of balance, so there's no need to worry about it. Except my brain keeps tellin' me that I'm responsible for this particular cat and have to do everythin' to ensure no harm comes to him and maybe the usual cat barriers to harm will somehow fail him and I have to stop that.

[Dirk: a terrible parent in one lifetime, now a person paranoid about cat well-being. It probably doesn't help that this cat is Dave's.

The question, though.]

Yeah. I'm glad I don't too. [A pause.] I never fought Reapers, and I always flew in and out. [He does want Dave to know he didn't take risks.]

[parodeity]

[ he stretches out the leg he isn't hugging/leaning against to nudge dirk's ankle. with his foot. it is an unspoken chill, dude. ]

He's fine. Look at 'im go. If you wanna swap to laser pointer let me know.

[ the cat will get played with either way and probably will not protest a different toy too much. ]

I know you didn't fight them. [ or he was pretty sure dirk didn't, given how the whole dream fighting reapers fiasco went. ] It's just an uneasy thought, is maybe how you'd put it? Or I don't know how you'd put it but that's how I'd put it.

[ the way in which distance is required, for both of them. ]

[splinten]

[Dirk pushes his ankle back? Don't call on him to chill. He's always chill. Chill as ice cream.]

I definitely want to try the laser pointer.

[Because that's fun for everyone, always

Clarifying:] That I went to the Aurora?

[parodeity]

[ chill as ice cream in the worst summer heat in australia, maybe. dave corrects dirk: ]

That you had to go at all. [ he pulls the laser pointer from his sylladex (helpfully provided by rose, who got it made by ursula presumably, so it's. purple) out. ] Feather thing away or he'll get confused.

[ and he'll just do the laser pointer when dirk complies, which mostly seems to be spinning it around lazily and trying to get macklemeow to run in circles because it's funny. ]

[splinten]

[Okay this is funny. This is deeply hilarious.

Wait.]

Why?

[this isn't a question about feathers]

[parodeity]

[ he moves the red dot to dirk's foot so macklemeow pounces on said foot, in full kitten viciousness. ]

It makes me sad, I think? [ the idea of it, or the way they are, or - ] Or it just feels like a sad concept. Not pathetic-sad, just sad-sad. Sort of melancholic-sad.

[splinten]

[That is adorable. Dirk wiggles his toes.]

Because it means I'm a dysfunctional human being who, after years of total physical isolation that should make me grateful for the company, still manages to be an asshole and need distance from totally decent people?

[parodeity]

What.

[ he forgets for a second to keep the laser pointer button down. luckily, wiggling toes are as good a target as a red dot so the cat doesn't notice dave's lapse. ]

No? Why the fuck would you put it like that. [ god ] That isn't even what I meant, not really.

[splinten]

That seems kinda sad to me. [At least his toes wiggle.] What did you mean?