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[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER | RED | #E00707
TEXT | ACTION

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[parodeity]

[ another shrug. ] Whenever you do or never. Oh, or if the human personification of an apple showed up.

[windeity]

Why does it have to be when I do? [He's not questioning the apple thing because like. That's expected as much as he hates that.]

[parodeity]

Uh...I don't know? [ that was for sure a thing he did not mean to say. dave...keeps shrugging... ] Like. If you started dating someone, I would probably get lonely enough to look around. You know I'm a needy little bitch.

[windeity]

You really are. [Since they're being honest? But it's said in a way that he absolutely doesn't even care, he's used to Dave pestering at literally all hours ever.] I don't know. I am not really interested in dating right now considering the circumstances.

[...there's Roxy, but it's not really an ideal dating situation and he's not going to bring it up.]

[parodeity]

[ there's a small little smile, and dave shrugs. ] Anyway, it's a moot point until you inevitably get interested in dating and abandon me.

[windeity]

I'm not going to abandon you for a girl, idiot. [Just sayin?] That would first of all be very uncool of me, and second of all I have been on the other end of that and it's shitty. No thanks.

[parodeity]

You say that now. [ but he knows john would stick around. it would just maybe be a little different. ] And yeah, I know. We'd just have to recalibrate and stop doin' some of the stuff we do.

[windeity]

[...???]

Like what? [John Egbert: a boy who assumes sometimes sharing beds with your friends is just normal.]

[parodeity]

[ dave just starts. listing them off on his fingers. ] Sleepin' together, the whole first priority bullshit, probably dial back on the physical contact just like by a mile or so, flirting, playdates. You know, the stuff you would presumably actually do with a significant other if you had one??

[windeity]

[He's just. Staring for a sec.]

...we're not flirting.

[It's terrible that he 100% believes this.]

[parodeity]

Well, yeah, you're not. [ probably??? ] But my point was datin' stuff goes with, like, dating people. Ergo a recalibration. It's not like hugely important right now or anything, dumbass.

[windeity]

[Huh???????????

He's. Going to try to process that, but also. ???????????]

Wait are you flirting? [What if he just stays on this for a second.]

[parodeity]

[ the world's most unconvincing: ] ...No?

[windeity]

[...

Hm.

He doesn't quite know what to say about that so he just kind of looks at him...and finally shrugs.

What if we don't talk about that right now.]

Okay. So like. Recalibration. We can figure that out whenever it is a thing that comes up. That's fine.

[parodeity]

We can like, start now if you want. [ the refrain of jesus strider dial it back would have been a useful one to actually ever listen to. it comes up now and then. ] I mean, I can work on that.

[windeity]

...no, it's fine. [He sounds a little thoughtful but he's sure of that.] Don't worry about it.

[parodeity]

[ dave at least takes john at his word, and john isn't like flipping out at him, so the tension in his shoulders eases a little. ] Cool. I think we're gonna have leftover pastries. Maybe I should give some out.

[windeity]

[Yeah they can like. Discuss that sometime John actually knows how to even discuss that.] You could. Or we could eat them? They are really good.

[He hates pastries. And yet.]

[parodeity]

I remember you said you liked 'em at the party, so I asked him to teach me how to make them.

[windeity]

Yeah? They turned out even better. [#biased.] ...thanks dude. Seriously.

[parodeity]

I figured I'd make them for you on your next birthday instead of cake. Or the one I made up for you.

[windeity]

I'd like that. Shouldn't I know exactly when my made-up birthday is?

[parodeity]

I keep plannin' it and then like. Werewolves????

[windeity]

Do werewolves impede on having fake birthdays?

[parodeity]

Well, if I want a party.