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[parodeity]

DAVE STRIDER

consider this your warning about stairs. itll just keep happening bro. im telling you man

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GO HERE FOR NEW THREADS!!!!!!! This one loads slow for me.

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[parodeity]

[ ok bye john?? dave just eyes him from his own bed and gently places the soda can on his desk.

...he proceeds to put his phone to the side for a moment to focus on petting the cat, who has decided to meow until he does this? ]

That's still not a definitive statement, dude.

[windeity]

[Mewpac is needy and she's probably happy when Dave pays attention. John, on the other hand, is burrowing his face in his blue bedding.]

I will definitely not need a reason to butter you up. I promise that it was just because.

[...after a moment though he goes quiet and...moves before holding up a plastic spider. Give him a second to shake out his blankets and reveal a fuckton of plastic spiders.]

...she is better at this than I thought.

[parodeity]

I warned you like twenty times, dude, you brought Rose on yourself.

[ dave's voice from the other side of the room is fairly wry. ]

If this turns into a big prank war thing, I demand to be left out in the cold?

[windeity]

You hate the cold so I am not sure how that will work for you. [He sits up, frowning at the spiders before looking at Dave again.] No wonder she said she was tame.

[parodeity]

I would rather die of hypothermia than get caught in the crosshairs of an Egbert-L - Strider prank war. Also, Rose is only ever tame if she wants to be.

[ he rolls his eyes, gaze more or less locked on the kitten who is on his chest kneading at his sweater? ]

[windeity]

[He gets up again, shaking a spider out of his sweater before crossing the room again and settling on the edge of Dave's bed. He'll also reach out to scratch the kitten behind the ears.]

I doubt that, but okay. I mean I would win in the end so it would be fine, but okay.

[parodeity]

[ hi john ig?? ]

I am pretty sure it would end with your untimely death even if you won the prankster's gambit duel? [ but the corner of his lips quirks up. ] But maybe it's best we never find out.

[windeity]

Worth it, maybe. [Not really but he'll also make himself comfortable to pet the cat and kind of sprawl over Dave's legs I guess.] I will eventually get her back but it has to be when she will not be expecting it.

[parodeity]

[ what is john even doing with his life. dave doesn't, like, complain? but he does wonder why john is on his bed, but fails to ask. ]

Again, possibly while innocent Daves are not in the vicinity. [ he pauses. ] You've never tried to pull shit on me really.

[windeity]

[That's a great question.]

Possibly. [But he focuses on Mewpac instead for now.] You asked me not to, so yeah. I wouldn't.

[parodeity]

...I asked you not to inside our room.

[ he hadn't actually thought john would keep his pranks to himself outside of the room? ]

But you've never tried anything out there, either.

[windeity]

I can if you want. I am getting a little rusty anyway. [Lazily. He's not really serious about that and given that he's letting the cat bat at his finger instead that's pretty clear.]

[parodeity]

It was more an if you want thing? [ what is dave trying to do with his life, followup question to what is john trying to do with his life. ]

[windeity]

[He lifts an eyebrow.] I mean. Thanks, I think, but that is also kind of a weird thing to say, dude.

[parodeity]

[ it’s less weird with the context of dave spending a lifetime trying to give someone what they wanted or what he thought they wanted but yeah oops ]

We’re best friends?

[windeity]

Yeah, we are. And any pranks I pull on you outside of the room will come later probably. [If at all. Somehow after everything he learned in October the idea of pranking Dave specifically isn't appealing. He even sounds mildly disinterested as he gets more comfortable, sort of stretching on Dave's bed so he can pet the cat with one hand and navigate his phone and the Retrospec post with the other.]

[parodeity]

[ ...at least dave is self aware enough to realize this his knee jerk concern this is some kind of trap is stupid as hell. as is probably usual with him, he doesn’t shift as john situates himself or after, careful not to jostle him on accident.]

Aren’t you supposed to be celebrating blue?

[windeity]

There are way too many fake spiders in my bed to bother shaking them out right now. I will do that later. Plus I am definitely celebrating blue. My bed looks good and not like it belongs in a prison cell.

[parodeity]

I can do it fast if you want. [ Why is he offering...but ok looks like john is hanging out at least until bed? ] Anything interesting on the network?

[windeity]

[He lazily waves his hand like he's saying "don't worry about it" or such.]

Looks like a bunch of new people again. This shit really is bi-monthly. Also are you arguing with people about apple juice versus orange juice?

[parodeity]

It’s not an argument because I’m right.

[windeity]

Other juices exist in this world besides apple. [There's a snicker though.] Can't wait to see what happens when some of these people realize oranges also have faces.

[parodeity]

I have my reasons. [ anyway is john laying on top of his legs here or what what position exactly am I dealing with for both cats? ]

[windeity]

Whatever. [He's like. Partially sprawled on Dave's legs and spilling onto the bed so kind or perpendicular. This way Dave's legs are pinned, he can see his bed, and also he can pet the cat while browsing his phone.]

But I've been talking to a lot of people so that is always nice.

[parodeity]

Yeah? [ ok. dave reaches down to toy with john’s hair idly because john has normalized the dumbest shit. ] Talk about anything interesting today?