personal overflow post;

[parodeity]

Comments

[notyourutopian]

[There's a delay.]

Angry.
And
Violent.

I've seen her kill people.

[parodeity]

yeah
thats a hard thing to remember yourself doing

[notyourutopian]

Yeah...
And I think I understand why she's doing it but.
I don't want to feel that way.
But I know it's there.

[parodeity]

you dont want to know youre capable of those things

[notyourutopian]

[There's a delay.]

It's.

...

I'm pretty sure I already am.

[parodeity]

yeah
i am too

[notyourutopian]

Bloody hell.
Heh
I can't say this is what I thought I'd be worrying about this time last year.

[parodeity]

same
it would be nice to worry about things not this
but it is what it is you know

[notyourutopian]

Yeah

If you could stop it
Would you?

[parodeity]

no

[notyourutopian]

I guess it would be hard to give up time travel powers.

[parodeity]

its less that and more it would feel like giving up myself at this point

[notyourutopian]

I don't think I'll ever understand how you manage to be okay with so much of this.

That's not an insult, for the record. I'm a little jealous.

[parodeity]

idk if its being ok
so much as just remembering so much
?

[notyourutopian]

Not sure who you'd be if you didn't know it, now?

[parodeity]

no i just
i know who i am

[notyourutopian]

Hah.

Well in that case I'm definitely jealous.

[parodeity]

i mean
dont you know who you want to be?

[notyourutopian]

I
I mean sometimes?
I know what I want to DO
Most of the




No, not really.

[parodeity]

i mean
do you know who you dont want to be then?

[notyourutopian]

Yeah
Unless there are a lot of things about her I don't know.

[parodeity]

you wont know until you remember more unfortunately

[notyourutopian]

Yeah.
That's the part that drives me mad I think.
They say we are these people.
That we're remembering who we were or becoming them or whatever.
But then we get these useless little moments that don't actually tell us who this person we apparently really was!
I get to see her murder someone
Or be a terrified child.
Or hang out with a bunch of her sisters it

Maybe I wouldn't be so angry about it if she seemed like more than just snapshots.

[parodeity]

yeah
it helps when you have the framework
or when you
see enough to know things i think

[notyourutopian]

Yeah...
I keep waiting for that one piece that will make it all make sense.