Honestly they both sound a little too sweet for me. But ok, if you don't sell soda, what does she like to drink? Or...do you have any better prank ideas than me?
I can think of a few but they might get me fired, so I'm gonna stick with yours. She likes espressos, so that shouldn't be hard, at least... Maybe we can give her a decaf shot instead? Or would that be too mean?
Per-fect! She might get suspicious if I just hand her a drink outta nowhere, but I've got a good plan. I can pop back there and make you something since I still have a freebie from my morning shift anyway. Order a double-shot espresso but when I give it to you, say you forgot and meant to order decaf so I can give her the extra. The one I give you will be caffeinated and the one she gets'll be decaf! That way, I can see your face when you try a dark roast double-shot espresso, too.
[Since he's just assuming Dave doesn't drink coffee much, or at all, if he thought they were selling soda here. Why is he like this...]
Oh-- Oooh, sorry, sorry! You only drink decaf, right?
[LEMONFACE IS IN THE BACKGROUND honestly probably not caring too much because shit like this happens every now and then. As long as Dave isn't chucking the drink across the counter, things are clearly going well...]
Hang on a sec.
[As he makes a second drink craftily, this one being the rEAL caffeinated one. So diabolical. Holding the cup out and holding his hand out for the first one! And while he's doing that:]
Mm, guys, I got a double-shot espresso here. Anyone want it?
["Anyone", even though he's looking deadass right at Lemonfacehead. She looks back, looks at the drink, and nods over toward the back employee counter, saying something like leave it there and I'll take it.]
[DELIGHT. He always enjoys when people likes the drinks he makes, even if it's something this simple...
He'll also give Dave a big "OKAY" sign and then a thumbs up when Lemonface finally takes a sip of her cursed coffee. Mission success.
And then because he's allergic to work, he's right the heck on outta there before anyone can try to rope him in for an extra shift or something. Once he's back over to Dave:]
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[POINTING to a particularly grumpy-looking lady standing over by the espresso machine... True to her name, she looks like she's been eating lemons.]
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[Sickeningly sweet and ridiculous-looking... The mermaid one honestly isn't better.]
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[That is very mean.]
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[ LET'S BE MEAN, KASHUU ]
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[Since he's just assuming Dave doesn't drink coffee much, or at all, if he thought they were selling soda here. Why is he like this...]
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A'ight, sounds like a plan for me. See you in five?
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Five sounds good!
[AND AWAY HE'LL FLOUNCE to go explain to his coworkers that he's back for his free drink so he can get behind the barista bar again.]
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Here! One double-shot espresso.
[AND HERE THEY GO, THE DRINK SWITCHAROO TANGO.]
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Ah, this ain't what I asked for...
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[LEMONFACE IS IN THE BACKGROUND honestly probably not caring too much because shit like this happens every now and then. As long as Dave isn't chucking the drink across the counter, things are clearly going well...]
Hang on a sec.
[As he makes a second drink craftily, this one being the rEAL caffeinated one. So diabolical. Holding the cup out and holding his hand out for the first one! And while he's doing that:]
Mm, guys, I got a double-shot espresso here. Anyone want it?
["Anyone", even though he's looking deadass right at Lemonfacehead. She looks back, looks at the drink, and nods over toward the back employee counter, saying something like leave it there and I'll take it.]
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also dave takes a sip of his non-shitty coffee whenever kashuu is around to see his expression as requested...
he actually looks a little surprised but then will take another sip.
v good 10/10 ]
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He'll also give Dave a big "OKAY" sign and then a thumbs up when Lemonface finally takes a sip of her cursed coffee. Mission success.
And then because he's allergic to work, he's right the heck on outta there before anyone can try to rope him in for an extra shift or something. Once he's back over to Dave:]
Good work, good work!
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You too, man.
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That's the first prank I've pulled in a while where I don't have to worry about getting arrested.
[Who is he.]
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[Isn't that just... reassuring...?!]
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[No he just doesn't want to talk about his unglamorous life of drinking and trying to pull fast ones on cops.]
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[ it won't ]
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[It sure doesn't...]
So! Anything else you wanna mark off, or is that enough to call it a day?
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[FOR DIVING INTO THE DEPTHS OF IDIOCY WITH HIM.]