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[parodeity]

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[quadjumps]

what would you need me to cook

[parodeity]

can you actually cook or do we need 2 come up with another task for you tho is my question

[quadjumps]

i'm an ice skater i don't have time to cook

[ what????? ]

[parodeity]

youre really bad at negotiations arent you

[quadjumps]

ok look what do you want me to make
i didn't say i don't know how to cook at all

[parodeity]

do you know how to make apple pie

[quadjumps]

maybe
do you?
i'm curious

[parodeity]

it might be among my many talents and skills but it also might not be
who can really say whether or not they can make apple pie
like
there are so many types of apple pie to be made?
and can you just MAKE it or can you make it taste GOOD
there are too many variables to be considered here
its impossible to say yes or no

[quadjumps]

[ holy shit dirk was not kidding when he said this would be a trial ]

okay okay you know what i can make that's good
vatrushka

[parodeity]

[ dave is a rambling menace to society and must be stopped. ]

whats vatrushka
does it involve vats
or bats
im not sure why it would involve bats except they rhyme
actually a lot of unfortunate things rhyme with ats

[quadjumps]

[ dave. stop this. ]

what the fuck? no
it's bread with quark in the middle

[parodeity]

that sounds deadly so im gonna assume youre not referring to subatomic particles carrying a fractional electric charge
but instead something maybe russian

[quadjumps]

..........yes.
i'm russian.

[parodeity]

cool whats that like
and what the fuck is russian quark

[quadjumps]

??? it's russian i guess??
and quark is like cheese kind of

[parodeity]

ok so youre offering me a cheesy apple thing????

[quadjumps]

yeah i guess i can put apples in it
does that work

[parodeity]

i would be interested in trying such a thing i think
and could possibly be persuaded to give you a straight answer in exchange for it although of course
theres no saying one way or the other for sure
thats so far in the future

[quadjumps]

....can't you see what happens in the future
aren't you a time traveler

[parodeity]

dont you like the future to occasionally have surprises
im not sure id call myself a time traveler so much as a time denizen