he debates asking if he can kiss john again but decides that while john has the luck of the devil dave sure does not and stalls out for a second, unsure where to go from there and worrying at his lip as he debates.
just...give him a second to figure out what he's even doing with his life. his hand didn't actually leave john's neck and his thumb rubs and absent-minded circle meant to soothe his own damn nerves. ]
[He's getting used to the idea. He's keeping his hands on Dave's shoulders and he's letting Dave take his time to think even as he gives another uncertain smile.]
...Nothing? [ or. well. it's not exactly wrong, maybe, he's just...perpetually uncertain. ] I just. Want to kiss you again, or hold your hand or. Something.
[ hug him, etc, ]
So I am trying to figure out a thing that is not that. Usually I go with "how about a joke to piss someone off". Can I interest you in disparaging remarks about your taste in movies engineered to start an argument?
[ then dave will kiss back for a brief moment without thinking about it before raising an eyebrow. ]
Matthew Mcwhateverthefuck signs on for the worst movies, but Failure to Launch actually has to take the cake? Animal humor can be ok sometimes but they stretch it. The whole "oh no, I was bitten by an animal" thing is like - there are movies where that is cool and it works for the genre, but a romcom isn't actually the place for it, or at least it was a weird tonal shift whenever it happened. Granted, the entire premise of the damn movie itself was also an uncompelling shitshow and I do not understand how you think otherwise? Like, okay, if they want to kick the kid out of the house, why don't they just do it??
[ - why has he put so much thought into this? he can keep going. ]
Oh my god, have you been planning for this? Have you just been waiting for me to say you can insult the great Matthew McConaughey so that you can go off on this particular movie?
I do not have to plan for this when the faults of that movie and also the not-so-great Matthew Mcblahdeblah? They are obvious and intrinsic and come to mind immediately?
[ like ok hear him out ]
What do you actually think is redeeming about that movie, Egbert, wow me.
I'm aware, but 90s kids all should've watched it??
[ dave you were only BARELY a 90s kid in this universe anyway.
and that wasn't an answer. ]
...I would've if this hadn't happened, so I am once we're out the door? [ does he seriously intend to pretend nothing happened until john comes up with some kind of answer or convinces dave he has to have input too. probably. ] Unless that's not. Okay? Now?
And the cartoon. [But he lets that thread of conversation drop.] It's fine. Please stay? I know it is a little weird now, considering, but...I think we both sleep easier that way?
I guess I know what we're doing next Saturday. The whole thing is on Netflix. [Yes, he seriously checked before. But he gets that Dave is stalling so he allows it. Take your time, Dave.]
[ yeah whatever it was john's turn to pick or dave doesn't really care so he just shrugs assent. he...
turns off. the camera. and stows it in his sylladex, his hand dropping from john's neck to do so, and then he reaches up to take johns hand's off his shoulders, letting them fall to the piano bench twisted in his.
he opens his mouth. pauses. lets go of one of john's hands and reaches up to shove his shades up into his hair because he'd told john once that he only bothered to do this when he didn't want to be misunderstood and he's not sure it'll help but at least he can try.
then he just goes back to holding john's hands in place on the bench between them for a minute or two. ]
You're my best friend. [ ...that wasn't where he knew he was going to start since he had no fucking clue where he was starting but it seems like the most important place to start, slow and monotonous and quiet as he forces himself to actually look john in the eyes. he pulls a face for a second because it's weird and serious and hard but then his expression smooths out into neutral. ]
We've covered the reasons I might ditch [ if it was for john's own good ] but even in those, you'd still be my best friend. Full stop. Period at the end of a telegram. Paid for it extra and all just 'cause it was that important.
[ don't get on a tangent about telegrams holy shit. he barely stops himself from doing so? ]
That hasn't changed? And the whole...everything else we do. While we can stop all those things if you ever want, which has always been true, they're not...related to this. [ or they are. but like. ] They do not have to be related to this, exactly, since we would be doing them anyway? [ um. ]
I mean [ how to put this ] that regardless of whatever. This is. Or if we ever even broach the topic again. The things I've told you I want to do are still true, if you don't mind them, or if you want them too. I don't, like. Intend to stop being your best friend just because we're...whatever the hell. So.
[ so. ]
About sleeping together, or Saturdays or Tuesdays, or whatever else. You don't have to like...ask me about them again. You're still who I want to spend that time with. Okay? And we can ignore this for forever if you want, and you can have all the time in the universe. Or whatever. It's not really important; I just...am not going anywhere. You're my best friend. Okay?
[ he's not even sure if john needed to hear that so he blows out a breath but. he tried? ]
[Dave got the patent on the poker face which means that John's expressions are pretty wide open for interpretation. He lets Dave hold his hands in place and he stares into his eyes for a moment, making sure to memorize them and almost missing the first part of what Dave says. He starts off saying that John's his best friend and he looks crestfallen for a moment like he expects Dave to turn him down after all.
But he listens. He's quiet and his hands grip onto Dave's a little but other than that he listens before..his face relaxes. His shoulders sag a little in relief and there's a tired smile his way.
Maybe he'll realize that the things they're doing are pretty much dating anyway, but that'll be another day. One step at a time. He's been terrified of messing up and even told someone else that he was more concerned about his friendship than anything else (though no names were mentioned.) He wants Saturdays and Tuesdays and falling asleep together and trying to make Dave laugh and watching him with their kitten and...
...it sounds stupid, in retrospect. This all sounds so normal and yet he needs to decide if this is safe for them to keep doing this. It's pretty clear it's what he needed to hear though and he nods.]
I'm not going anywhere either so...everything else can be figured out later. Right? [With time. After John thinks.] You're my best friend before everything else and that is why I need time.
Okay. [ which is what he said the first time john asked for time, so that hasn't, like, changed. he lets go of john's hands and his left hand hooks under john's chin to tilt his face up a little, and dave frowns. ]
You actually do need to go to sleep? I am capable of recognizing exhaustion when I see it, you know. I'll drive home?
[ because he's reasonably sure this is the face of someone very tired and that's what he's checking for, already shutting away the rest of it for later or never and sliding back into his usual position in john's life, which he hasn't been thrown out of just yet. ]
[He automatically dips into Dave's hand, resting his chin on his fingers and looking at him with a strange mixture of adoration and also sleep-deprivation.]
It's okay. I can still drive...[And the last part is mumbled.] I want to spend more time with you.
I am not getting in a car with you driving when you are this tired?
[ idiot. ]
Me driving still counts as spending time with you, and also, we are going to the same place. Do I not still rate driving privileges? [ ... ] Yo, don't repeat this little stunt for the holidays, okay? Sleep is your friend and you are not so good at goin' without it as I am, so like...don't do that. Idiot.
[ he's standing up and he lets go of john's chin but ruffles john's hair. rolls his eyes and flips his shades back down a second after. ]
[Grumbling a little but okay, fine, he's going to grab his keys and hand them over. Fun fact, Dave might notice upon touch that John's hair is gel-free today. Still, he gets up and he doesn't yawn but he does close the lid to the piano keys.]
Winter break starts this upcoming weekend. We can sleep a lot and do whatever.
It's cute how you completely forgot you have a job. [ he notices that but doesn't mention it, just ushering john out of the room so he can relock the door via dumb skills. ] And that I have a job. A few jobs. But yeah, without classes the workload'll be a little lighter.
[ watch dave try to pick up extra shifts out of sheer anxiety ]
[ john he'll notice ur name go off the flix schedule if you lose it? ]
I remember. [ and then there's the. holiday bullshit. which he just...doesn't...address currently. back to the car to unlock it and pop john's door since dave's driving. ha. ] Are you going to start letting me help you with your damn math homework again?
[He's doing his best. But he follows Dave to his own car and slides into the passenger seat, grinning slightly instead.]
Next term? I am pretty done with math for this one and I think by switching majors I get to avoid a lot of it. But whatever math I do end up with I will need your help, yes.
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he debates asking if he can kiss john again but decides that while john has the luck of the devil dave sure does not and stalls out for a second, unsure where to go from there and worrying at his lip as he debates.
just...give him a second to figure out what he's even doing with his life. his hand didn't actually leave john's neck and his thumb rubs and absent-minded circle meant to soothe his own damn nerves. ]
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...what's wrong, Dave?
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...Nothing? [ or. well. it's not exactly wrong, maybe, he's just...perpetually uncertain. ] I just. Want to kiss you again, or hold your hand or. Something.
[ hug him, etc, ]
So I am trying to figure out a thing that is not that. Usually I go with "how about a joke to piss someone off". Can I interest you in disparaging remarks about your taste in movies engineered to start an argument?
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Sure. Take a crack at it.
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Matthew Mcwhateverthefuck signs on for the worst movies, but Failure to Launch actually has to take the cake? Animal humor can be ok sometimes but they stretch it. The whole "oh no, I was bitten by an animal" thing is like - there are movies where that is cool and it works for the genre, but a romcom isn't actually the place for it, or at least it was a weird tonal shift whenever it happened. Granted, the entire premise of the damn movie itself was also an uncompelling shitshow and I do not understand how you think otherwise? Like, okay, if they want to kick the kid out of the house, why don't they just do it??
[ - why has he put so much thought into this? he can keep going. ]
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Oh my god, have you been planning for this? Have you just been waiting for me to say you can insult the great Matthew McConaughey so that you can go off on this particular movie?
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[ like ok hear him out ]
What do you actually think is redeeming about that movie, Egbert, wow me.
[ so what the fuck are they doing, again ]
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Also I think it would be cool to have a boat.
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...still sleeping in my bed tonight?
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[ dave you were only BARELY a 90s kid in this universe anyway.
and that wasn't an answer. ]
...I would've if this hadn't happened, so I am once we're out the door? [ does he seriously intend to pretend nothing happened until john comes up with some kind of answer or convinces dave he has to have input too. probably. ] Unless that's not. Okay? Now?
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We can marathon the cartoon?
[ it's. not that important. just give him a second to gather his thoughts to say what the fuck he needs to say ]
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turns off. the camera. and stows it in his sylladex, his hand dropping from john's neck to do so, and then he reaches up to take johns hand's off his shoulders, letting them fall to the piano bench twisted in his.
he opens his mouth. pauses. lets go of one of john's hands and reaches up to shove his shades up into his hair because he'd told john once that he only bothered to do this when he didn't want to be misunderstood and he's not sure it'll help but at least he can try.
then he just goes back to holding john's hands in place on the bench between them for a minute or two. ]
You're my best friend. [ ...that wasn't where he knew he was going to start since he had no fucking clue where he was starting but it seems like the most important place to start, slow and monotonous and quiet as he forces himself to actually look john in the eyes. he pulls a face for a second because it's weird and serious and hard but then his expression smooths out into neutral. ]
We've covered the reasons I might ditch [ if it was for john's own good ] but even in those, you'd still be my best friend. Full stop. Period at the end of a telegram. Paid for it extra and all just 'cause it was that important.
[ don't get on a tangent about telegrams holy shit. he barely stops himself from doing so? ]
That hasn't changed? And the whole...everything else we do. While we can stop all those things if you ever want, which has always been true, they're not...related to this. [ or they are. but like. ] They do not have to be related to this, exactly, since we would be doing them anyway? [ um. ]
I mean [ how to put this ] that regardless of whatever. This is. Or if we ever even broach the topic again. The things I've told you I want to do are still true, if you don't mind them, or if you want them too. I don't, like. Intend to stop being your best friend just because we're...whatever the hell. So.
[ so. ]
About sleeping together, or Saturdays or Tuesdays, or whatever else. You don't have to like...ask me about them again. You're still who I want to spend that time with. Okay? And we can ignore this for forever if you want, and you can have all the time in the universe. Or whatever. It's not really important; I just...am not going anywhere. You're my best friend. Okay?
[ he's not even sure if john needed to hear that so he blows out a breath but. he tried? ]
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But he listens. He's quiet and his hands grip onto Dave's a little but other than that he listens before..his face relaxes. His shoulders sag a little in relief and there's a tired smile his way.
Maybe he'll realize that the things they're doing are pretty much dating anyway, but that'll be another day. One step at a time. He's been terrified of messing up and even told someone else that he was more concerned about his friendship than anything else (though no names were mentioned.) He wants Saturdays and Tuesdays and falling asleep together and trying to make Dave laugh and watching him with their kitten and...
...it sounds stupid, in retrospect. This all sounds so normal and yet he needs to decide if this is safe for them to keep doing this. It's pretty clear it's what he needed to hear though and he nods.]
I'm not going anywhere either so...everything else can be figured out later. Right? [With time. After John thinks.] You're my best friend before everything else and that is why I need time.
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You actually do need to go to sleep? I am capable of recognizing exhaustion when I see it, you know. I'll drive home?
[ because he's reasonably sure this is the face of someone very tired and that's what he's checking for, already shutting away the rest of it for later or never and sliding back into his usual position in john's life, which he hasn't been thrown out of just yet. ]
Drivin' tired is as dangerous as drivin' drunk.
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It's okay. I can still drive...[And the last part is mumbled.] I want to spend more time with you.
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[ idiot. ]
Me driving still counts as spending time with you, and also, we are going to the same place. Do I not still rate driving privileges? [ ... ] Yo, don't repeat this little stunt for the holidays, okay? Sleep is your friend and you are not so good at goin' without it as I am, so like...don't do that. Idiot.
[ he's standing up and he lets go of john's chin but ruffles john's hair. rolls his eyes and flips his shades back down a second after. ]
Keys?
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Winter break starts this upcoming weekend. We can sleep a lot and do whatever.
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[ watch dave try to pick up extra shifts out of sheer anxiety ]
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Yeah. And we're signed up for that charity drive ReVA's doing, too, remember? So maybe it is not much of a vacation but it won't be as stressful.
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I remember. [ and then there's the. holiday bullshit. which he just...doesn't...address currently. back to the car to unlock it and pop john's door since dave's driving. ha. ] Are you going to start letting me help you with your damn math homework again?
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Next term? I am pretty done with math for this one and I think by switching majors I get to avoid a lot of it. But whatever math I do end up with I will need your help, yes.
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[ but okay good. he buckles in and waits for john to do the same before he'll start up the car. ]
Luckily I will probably not let you flounder. [ dave you literally just expressed an exasperated desire to help john with his math homework which is
weird
but it was bothering him john kept not letting him ]
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