personal overflow post;

[parodeity]

Comments

[roseblooms]

We are now in a perpetually hypothetical zone, rest assured.

Why would you do that? Go against your own feelings for his sake?

[parodeity]

because even putting any hypothetical zone attraction
id do anything for the people i love
and
i dont know
i guess its how i was raised?

[roseblooms]

Well, yes, but my point is, when you reverse those positions, it makes you sad to contemplate someone doing that for you.

Doesn't it follow, then, that you doing it for someone else might upset them, rather than please them?

[parodeity]

ok you are assuming that either person in this hypothetical isnt a complete dumbass
which is like
giving the hypothetical people way too much credit maybe

[roseblooms]

I'm only offering up the suggestion that the two of you are fairly alike — hypothetically — in a number of ways, and as such it's both fairly likely that he'll make exactly the same mistakes as you, and that he'll understand any attempts to avoid those mistakes by heading them off at the pass.

[parodeity]

heading them off
like
how

[roseblooms]

Talking to him, frankly, about your concerns.

...Or alternatively concocting an elaborate subterfuge in which you have someone else conduct reconnaissance for you, I suppose, but either way.

[parodeity]

i like option b better
although
idk what kinda reconnaissance id need to do
when im into a hypothetically straight guy

i mean
hypothetically
that would be a thing i was
in this hypothetical situation

[roseblooms]

Would you like me to go hit on him?

Hypothetically.

[parodeity]

how would that help youre hot enough to overcome gender preferences

[roseblooms]

...I.

Oh?

[parodeity]

i mean
HYPOTHETICALLY

[roseblooms]

I'm hypothetically flattered, albeit not entirely sure if you're insinuating that I'd look as good in a dress as I would in a suit.

[parodeity]

hypothetically you probably would depending on the cut and style of the dress
its not like people can just throw on ANY dress and look ok
its like a suit
cut matters

[roseblooms]

...

What cut and style of dress, hypothetically?

[parodeity]

i think it ruins my hypothetical credibility if i admit to giving this any serious thought

[roseblooms]

I will guarantee a blanket presumption of hypothetical-ability if you present your conclusions, no questions asked.

[parodeity]

evening gowns with like the swooping wrap necks you know

[roseblooms]

Those are called halter necks, I think.

I will neither confirm nor deny why I hypothetically know that.

[parodeity]

yeah those
i didnt want to use the technical term

[roseblooms]

Well, I don't own one of those, so to circle back to the original point, it's hardly as though I'd be hitting on him while wearing one.

[parodeity]

maybe that would help
because of the straight thing

[roseblooms]

You want me to go undercover as Christine Fawkes, a red-haired bombshell in a halter dress, and flirt with him to see who he's interested in.

[parodeity]

like the more complicated you make it the more fun it sounds?

[roseblooms]

By all means, help me think up an elaborate character backstory, then. Did she have a tragic childhood?