[ it really is the empathic feedback that did it for karkat. since like... no one should be that resigned about doing something with a person they supposedly love? and rose made it pretty clear that families are about love.
she also said a thing about a debate about what's more important, your family that you're actually genetically related to versus one that you chose on your own. it baffled him, but. he thinks he understands that a little better now? ]
I'm not as dumb as everyone thinks I am, you dick. I... not everyone really cared for their lusus? I know Vriska got a really shitty deal with hers, I think.
I just don't think I can handle having to explain why whatever he did wasn't...right. So I tried to get Rose to explain what was right? Only neither of us is any good at explaining anything without, like, getting side tracked and commentary and that was probably on my list of shitty ideas?
[ goddamnit rose all he wanted was for you to describe the ideal family life and not commentate but
he kind of knew in his heart that would fail. ]
I didn't want to give you a list of shit he did and have you not get it because of - I know you guys had shitty circumstances? I don't know. Idk if this is like, Dave the 24/7 training and do it yourself caretaking is par for the course why are you complainin' about it level of shit? Like. He never killed me? He stopped me dying once. Maybe twice.
[ bro was just, you know, a constant threat lurking, not lethal but everything up to that point. ]
[ karkat almost wants to ask how old dave was during the last memory? thanks to the three years on the meteor he has a better understanding of like, the earth calendar and that is the days go by really fucking slowly.
he squeezes dave's hand. ]
Okay. So just answer this question for me. Was what he did something that a normal, loving human family would do? Yes or no.
[ he has john's life as a reference, at least. and all the humans films he watched that all have a general lack or rooftop battles. ]
[ dave finally has to break eye contact, but it's just to. take a step forward and drop his head onto karkat's shoulder. it's easier than looking at the moment? karkat's lucky dave hasn't just flopped onto the ground. ]
[ his arms immediately wrap around dave, hugging him as closely as he can.
he probably won't ever fully understand how human families work and certain things will go over his head but karkat knows hate pretty well. and he knows love, too, and if there's one thing he definitely gets about families is that it's supposed to be about the latter?
rose made that part pretty clear. and so did the rest of the humans. shit, every time karkat accidentally walks in on the strilondes being weird and clingy, he gets it. ]
Dave, this is about to sound ridiculously sappy so feel free to stab me at any point during it to save us both from embarrassment. But you're... kind of the best fucking thing to ever happen to me, especially after everything that happened on the meteor before we met up with you? I love you and I kind of worry that I'm obnoxiously overbearing about it. I should probably try not to be so goddamn clingy but you deserve so much love?
[ ugh. this got gross. ]
Like. All the love. Ever. Shit, that sounded stupid, just cull me. Uh. I'm sorry that Bro didn't give that to you and if he wasn't already dead I'd probably bash his face in? And there are a lot of others who'd say the same because you're kind of important.
[ his reaction probably shouldn't be to laugh into karkat's shoulder, but it kind of is. it's not the idea of deserving love - though he's always unsure about that - but that karkat keeps offering to let him stab him and his boyfriend actually thinks it's possible there's a level of clingy dave will mind. sure, he never really liked karkat bugging him back when karkat was, you know, just "trolling" him and his friends, but that was different?
as much as he complains about shitty personality quizzes and chick flicks, he's never actually turned down either (or hasn't actually meant no when he said it).
he just turns his head slightly and kisses karkat's neck like that's a normal thing people do but. whatever. he doesn't want to move and that's nearest. ]
I love you, too. [ he doesn't even mutter it. ] Um. Okay. What other questions do you have? I'll try to do the. Talking portion of this experience.
karkat immediately thinks of the throwing off the roof thing again because he's still stuck on that?? dave did not know how to fly and human children look like they have questionable upper body strength at best. ]
Is this why you and Dirk are all [ skittish? trying so hard? annoying? a mix of all three? ] like that. Because of Lord Douchebag, tyrannical leader of stupid looking hats that logically speaking should not fit over his hair if it's anything like Dirk's?
[ like he's not moving away from the shoulder neck area so this is either muffled or directly in karkat's ear sorry not sorry ]
We talked. Back before the battle when Vriska, you know. Threw us together. And since then. He can guess some of the shit I didn't tell him, but he can't guess other parts of it. But he knows his pre-scratch self wasn't in my top ten faves list.
[ it's...not the best situation? they're trying. that counts for something, right? ]
He doesn't want to be Bro. I mean, he isn't except in the genetic sense. But yeah.
[ that makes the whole cal drama make a little more sense?
he kisses the side of dave's head. it's supposed to be comforting but mostly karkat does not want to miss a chance of doing that since dave is normally taller and his current position makes him... not... ]
Yeah. He can be an asshole but nowhere near this level of one. [ a pause. he is gonna go for it. ] How old were you in the last memory?
[ karkat is pretty sure the answer for that is no? there are enough grocery store scenes in movies for him to have the general idea that humans usually go shopping for food instead of going out and killing wildlife. so. ]
In the middle of the city? Nope. I just kind of stockpiled things in my closet. Occasionally I got my hands on cash for grocery shopping. Bro used to give me shit when I wasn't old enough to walk, though.
[ but yeah it was hard to find food in that house. puppets and weapons, though, those were just anywhere for the taking if you, like, wanted those.
This was definitely not me making out with your neck and I'm offended by the implication.
[ so instead of actually. agreeing. that would be a stupid course of action, he will actually actively tilt his head closer so he can kiss karkat's neck. there is a difference between talking into the neck/shoulder area and actively trying to fluster his boyfriend and honestly karkat should know better?
also he's a dick so he bites down lightly. dave does not have high hopes he can distract karkat from the issue at hand forever, but he's pretty sure he can get himself scolded and/or at least make karkat hit critical flustered levels in a minute or less. ]
[ he definitely should have seen this coming and has no one to blame but himself tbh. ]
Oh my god. Okay that's a thing. That you are doing right now. Dave. Dave? What the fuck.
[ ok yea there is definitely a difference between kissing someone's neck and just talking against it and karkat is unfortunately witnessing that difference. his face is so red right now, thank god they are alone?? ]
The thing I am doing is making out with your neck, and also science. Do you think dreamscape hickeys become irl hickeys? I somehow doubt anyone else has tested it yet and this is a very important topic that needs my undivided attention I've decided. Just now.
[ though his attention is divided by rambling. but whatever what else is new!! ]
Anyway I'm volunteering you for participation in this mission. Too late to back out now.
[ he's kind of laughing as he talks but he's still not. moving away? he'll go back to the neck kissing thing inbetween the just rambling about nonsense thing which is...pretty par for the course, actually. ]
You are such a fucking asshole, that's not even how this place-- ah, works. I think?
[ he assumes??? honestly he has no clue it's kind of hard to focus on anything that is not dave being a dick. he is like... 70% sure this won't give him a real life hickey.
granted even though he's complaining he isn't actually... moving out of the way... ]
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[ it really is the empathic feedback that did it for karkat. since like... no one should be that resigned about doing something with a person they supposedly love? and rose made it pretty clear that families are about love.
she also said a thing about a debate about what's more important, your family that you're actually genetically related to versus one that you chose on your own. it baffled him, but. he thinks he understands that a little better now? ]
I'm not as dumb as everyone thinks I am, you dick. I... not everyone really cared for their lusus? I know Vriska got a really shitty deal with hers, I think.
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[ he doesn't? ]
I just don't think I can handle having to explain why whatever he did wasn't...right. So I tried to get Rose to explain what was right? Only neither of us is any good at explaining anything without, like, getting side tracked and commentary and that was probably on my list of shitty ideas?
[ goddamnit rose all he wanted was for you to describe the ideal family life and not commentate but
he kind of knew in his heart that would fail. ]
I didn't want to give you a list of shit he did and have you not get it because of - I know you guys had shitty circumstances? I don't know. Idk if this is like, Dave the 24/7 training and do it yourself caretaking is par for the course why are you complainin' about it level of shit? Like. He never killed me? He stopped me dying once. Maybe twice.
[ bro was just, you know, a constant threat lurking, not lethal but everything up to that point. ]
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he squeezes dave's hand. ]
Okay. So just answer this question for me. Was what he did something that a normal, loving human family would do? Yes or no.
[ he has john's life as a reference, at least. and all the humans films he watched that all have a general lack or rooftop battles. ]
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No.
[ he answered, but it's very quiet. ]
No, he pretty much fuckin' hated me.
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he probably won't ever fully understand how human families work and certain things will go over his head but karkat knows hate pretty well. and he knows love, too, and if there's one thing he definitely gets about families is that it's supposed to be about the latter?
rose made that part pretty clear. and so did the rest of the humans. shit, every time karkat accidentally walks in on the strilondes being weird and clingy, he gets it. ]
Dave, this is about to sound ridiculously sappy so feel free to stab me at any point during it to save us both from embarrassment. But you're... kind of the best fucking thing to ever happen to me, especially after everything that happened on the meteor before we met up with you? I love you and I kind of worry that I'm obnoxiously overbearing about it. I should probably try not to be so goddamn clingy but you deserve so much love?
[ ugh. this got gross. ]
Like. All the love. Ever. Shit, that sounded stupid, just cull me. Uh. I'm sorry that Bro didn't give that to you and if he wasn't already dead I'd probably bash his face in? And there are a lot of others who'd say the same because you're kind of important.
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as much as he complains about shitty personality quizzes and chick flicks, he's never actually turned down either (or hasn't actually meant no when he said it).
he just turns his head slightly and kisses karkat's neck like that's a normal thing people do but. whatever. he doesn't want to move and that's nearest. ]
I love you, too. [ he doesn't even mutter it. ] Um. Okay. What other questions do you have? I'll try to do the. Talking portion of this experience.
[ he can MAYBE do this
he thinks
maybe
probably... ]
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karkat immediately thinks of the throwing off the roof thing again because he's still stuck on that?? dave did not know how to fly and human children look like they have questionable upper body strength at best. ]
Is this why you and Dirk are all [ skittish? trying so hard? annoying? a mix of all three? ] like that. Because of Lord Douchebag, tyrannical leader of stupid looking hats that logically speaking should not fit over his hair if it's anything like Dirk's?
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[ like he's not moving away from the shoulder neck area so this is either muffled or directly in karkat's ear sorry not sorry ]
We talked. Back before the battle when Vriska, you know. Threw us together. And since then. He can guess some of the shit I didn't tell him, but he can't guess other parts of it. But he knows his pre-scratch self wasn't in my top ten faves list.
[ it's...not the best situation? they're trying. that counts for something, right? ]
He doesn't want to be Bro. I mean, he isn't except in the genetic sense. But yeah.
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he kisses the side of dave's head. it's supposed to be comforting but mostly karkat does not want to miss a chance of doing that since dave is normally taller and his current position makes him... not... ]
Yeah. He can be an asshole but nowhere near this level of one. [ a pause. he is gonna go for it. ] How old were you in the last memory?
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Eight or so? So...a little nearer four sweeps than three?
[ he automatically tries to do the conversion, and he actually knows the exact equivalent of eight human years but doesn't...bother to give it... ]
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You said the fridge was filled with weapons?
[ trolls always had to feed themselves and their lusii, at but least the lusus didn't leave weapons lying around where food would normally go? ]
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[ because that would make actual sense ]
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[ karkat is pretty sure the answer for that is no? there are enough grocery store scenes in movies for him to have the general idea that humans usually go shopping for food instead of going out and killing wildlife. so. ]
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[ but yeah it was hard to find food in that house. puppets and weapons, though, those were just anywhere for the taking if you, like, wanted those.
dave never actually wanted those. ]
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How many people know? Besides Rose and Dirk.
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[ haha dave telling people shit, good joke, karkat. ]
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Well, that's three more people than I would expect from you, so that's something.
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[ and beforehand
like
everyone noticed that right ]
And I needed Rose's help to - yeah. [ fix that. ] And...I wanted you to know.
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a thought suddenly hits him. ]
Is this why you're farming at stupid o'clock when you should be asleep?
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Dirk's heart shit means he's always got a dream self active? And I really don't want him to see anything I accidentally dream up. Specifically Bro.
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[ karkat just points at himself. ]
... wait, I'm not sure if you saw that since you're busy making out with my neck, but I just gestured at me.
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[ so instead of actually. agreeing. that would be a stupid course of action, he will actually actively tilt his head closer so he can kiss karkat's neck. there is a difference between talking into the neck/shoulder area and actively trying to fluster his boyfriend and honestly karkat should know better?
also he's a dick so he bites down lightly. dave does not have high hopes he can distract karkat from the issue at hand forever, but he's pretty sure he can get himself scolded and/or at least make karkat hit critical flustered levels in a minute or less. ]
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Oh my god. Okay that's a thing. That you are doing right now. Dave. Dave? What the fuck.
[ ok yea there is definitely a difference between kissing someone's neck and just talking against it and karkat is unfortunately witnessing that difference. his face is so red right now, thank god they are alone?? ]
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[ though his attention is divided by rambling. but whatever what else is new!! ]
Anyway I'm volunteering you for participation in this mission. Too late to back out now.
[ he's kind of laughing as he talks but he's still not. moving away? he'll go back to the neck kissing thing inbetween the just rambling about nonsense thing which is...pretty par for the course, actually. ]
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[ he assumes??? honestly he has no clue it's kind of hard to focus on anything that is not dave being a dick. he is like... 70% sure this won't give him a real life hickey.
granted even though he's complaining he isn't actually... moving out of the way... ]
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