subnautica ic inbox 1.0;

[parodeity]

TELEPATHY | TEXT | VOICE | VIDEO | ACTION

GO HERE TO THE NEW INBOX, THIS INBOX NO LONGER LOADS EASY FOR ME

Comments

[parodeity]

dude pillow talk is a thing you have with someone in bed
like
after sex

[alienates]

OH
MY
FUCKING
*GOD*
I AM NOT HAVING SEX WITH JAKE ENGLISH!!!

[parodeity]

yeah i know that obviously
but youre definitely using a term generally used for post coital interactions and applying it to gossip time
so
im just gonna laugh at you for a bit here
or forever idk
ps def told dirk about this

[alienates]

STOP TELLING DIRK EVERYTHING!
I CHANGED MY MIND I AM NOT PROPOSING TO YOU.
PROPOSAL CANCELED.

[parodeity]

haha ok man i knew you werent gonna to start with so
nbd
also how can i not tell him shit when hes sitting right here and you keep making me laugh

[alienates]

THEN STOP LAUGHING, THIS ISN'T FUNNY.
AND ALSO? I CHANGED MY MIND AGAIN.
WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU TO SAY WHAT I WILL AND WILL NOT DO.
YOU ARE LUCKY THAT I AM CLASSY AND KNOW BETTER TO PROPOSE THROUGH FUCKING TEXT OR ELSE YOU WOULD BE GETTING A VIRTUAL RING SLAPPED ONTO YOUR FINGER.
O
^ AH LOOK, THERE'S THE MUCH TALKED UPON PIECE OF JEWELRY.
==
^ WHAT'S THAT? IS THAT A FINGER? COULD IT BE... A RING FINGER?
O==
^ IT'S A PERFECT FUCKING FIT, WOW. INCREDIBLE.
BUT SINCE I AM NOT SOME DUMBASS, I KNOW THAT THIS IS SOMETHING WE MUST DO IN PERSON AND ALSO WHEN DIRK IS NOT AROUND.
FUCK YOU DIRK.

[parodeity]

that kinda looks like you failed to draw a text dick but tried really hard to make one

[alienates]

NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT DICKS, DAVE.
FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE STOP THINKING ABOUT FUCKING DICKS!

[parodeity]

no dude but look
8==> dick
O== what you drew

you can see where i got this right
also hey i think about other things
like apples
have you had one of my apples yet btw
if not you should because i am the best farmer in the world
presumably
idk maybe theres an undiscovered island with farmers somewhere out there

[alienates]

DON'T DRAW DICKS YOU MORON.

UGH.
NO I HAVE NOT HAD ONE OF YOUR SHITTY APPLES YET.
ARE THEY ACTUALLY GOOD OR ARE YOU JUST SAYING THAT BECAUSE YOU'RE BIASED?
YOU GREW THEM SO OF COURSE YOU'D SAY THEY'RE EDIBLE.

[parodeity]

[ btw this work of art took him a few minutes ]

theyre amazing and you have to try them

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[alienates]

[ if you listen closely you can hear karkat screaming from elsewhere in the base. ]

WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST SAY?
WHAT. DID. I. JUST. SAY.
OH MY GOD JUST
SUCK IT?
SUCK THE BIGGEST FUCKING DICK AND CHOKE ON IT, YOU GIGANTIC TOOL.
AND THEN WHEN SOMEONE BENDS DOWN TO REVIVE YOU, GUESS WHAT?
THEY CAN'T BECAUSE OF THE GODDAMN DICK IN YOUR MOUTH.
YOUR GOD TIER POWERS CANNOT SAVE YOU FROM THIS JUST DEATH OF CHOKING ON DICK!
BUT DON'T WORRY, I WILL THROW A NICE LITTLE CORPSE PARTY FOR YOU.
I WILL EVEN PUT UP STREAMERS THAT SAY SOMETHING MOVING LIKE, "HE DIED THE WAY HE LIVED: MOUTH FULL OF MOTHERFUCKING DICK.