shut up while he has a stupid emotion. it's...it's a happy emotion??? BUT HE'S NOT SURE HOW TO DEAL WITH THE HAPPY EMOTION BEYOND FLOPPING SOMEWHERE, APPARENTLY, SHUT UP ]
[ dirk why are you trying to make him not talk to his pillow. dave takes two minutes to be absolutely certain his face is more. poker'd. than it was gonna be and says: ]
No! [ apparently sacrificing the vocal poker face. god. ] You dressed up like santa.
[They are, as mentioned, remixes of Dave's favourite movies on one, and then for the other they're songs that Dirk composed for Dave. The songs are named "Fraternality Sempiternal," "Semplice," "Shocked and Agape," and "Glucose Mobilities, Bro." The last track was contributed to by the rapping robots and in fact also the Magister singing, and dear Macklemeow doing as his name commands.
[ jesus fuck why would dirk do this to him. asks dave, a person who literally has composed music for dirk before. but he didn't expect the movie remix?
also he doesn't have his beard on it's just around his neck. while he like listens to all this stuff straight up before shifting his gaze to dirk.
he should say something meaningful, or thanks, or - ]
[That's fine, Dirk didn't just stare at Dave nervously for the whole time of all of this music and probably will not be staring at Dave intently through the movies, either. Really.]
[ right. he will just go over to his dresser and rummage around. putting things in "his" areas usually negates any chance dirk will look at them, probably, because dirk is...good about things like that? so.
but dirk gets a box and a flashdrive handed over. ]
I got you less things. [ THIS TROUBLES HIM GREATLY ]
[ there is inside a thin book which is...a less fancy scrapbook? not like the ones he keeps habitually, of which dirk has volume one. it's just a simple photo album, really, and dave endeavored to actually find any pictures of himself he had and threw them in there and called it a day. there are only a few from before the meteor, and only one of him before thirteen or so.
there is also a thick book, which is full of loose-leaf paper absolutely fucking covered in dave's handwriting. ]
Opinions.
[ AS...AN EXPLANATION...
like, it's dave, he can't dissert without getting distracted, but he made some sort of weirdly concentrated effort to give (occasionally contrary his actual opinions but not always) dirk the weirdest fucking collection of essays in the world. they would be terribly marked, because he cannot write in a straight line to save his life. also, the topics are...questionable. who needs an essay on ties vs. sharks? why is that even a thing that can be "vs."?? but sandwiched between the absurd are a few better-ish written ones on a few topics dave completely refused to get into debates about, or dropped, or only pretended to know partly when he actually knew what was being talked about.
[Dirk looks at the book, and all the pictures of Dave, and he looks at the writing. And he thinks, looking at what is in front of him, that what Dave gave him was himself.
It's the best gift Dirk could ever ask for. He hugs Dave without even asking about the flashdrive as he intended. He needs to hug his brother.]
[ "all the pictures" dirk there's only maybe 10 pages worth since he is Beyond his selfie stage when it's like, just him. the writing was
well god help dirk when he reads all that nonsense because it's 99% horrendous. dave makes a surprised sound at the hug but doesn't fight it, for obvious reasons.
(btw that flash drive is that claymation monster movie he was "maaaaaaaaaybe not" about letting dirk see and he's still ?????? about it but whatever.) ]
[ the claymation monster movie is terrible and probably does the thing where it says shit dave doesn't want it to say ala, like. probably what he feels the worst monsters are and an awkward view through his mind, but. just don't call him on that shit, dirk. ]
Love you too, Bro. [ see
this would be touching
but they're in santa outfits and dirk might be wearing his fake beard ]
[Dirk's definitely wearing his fake beard. What are you talking about. He's goddamned Santa Claus, Lucy. The author notes said bros should dress up like Santa. They didn't say bros should dress up like weirdos in red suits.]
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Uh.
[Did he fuck up. Shit.]
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[ SAID INTO THE PILLOW so it's more like
mngnnacr.
shut up while he has a stupid emotion. it's...it's a happy emotion??? BUT HE'S NOT SURE HOW TO DEAL WITH THE HAPPY EMOTION BEYOND FLOPPING SOMEWHERE, APPARENTLY, SHUT UP ]
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Dirk-Santa will sit down beside Dave, and tentatively put a hand on his head.]
Do you want me to unSanta.
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No! [ apparently sacrificing the vocal poker face. god. ] You dressed up like santa.
[ is
is that an accusation or a statement or ]
Because of my author's notes?
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Yeah.
[He isn't sure if it is an accusation or a statement but it seems like maybe this is a good thing so. He hopes so?]
I got you a Santa suit too but you don't have to wear it.
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[ DAVE THIS IS SUCH A FUCKING STUPID DREAM, WHY DO I PLAY YOU, I HATE THIS ]
Is that in the box? Are there beards. [ @ farrah why
all of this is said with a perfectly straight face but very! emphatic! monotone! ]
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[Okay. Okay, Dave seems happy. It puts an energy into Dirk's movements as he grabs the box and holds it out to Dave.]
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i hate this!!!!!! they could be in normal clothes!!!!!!! but no! ]
Can I check out the drives now? [ he will. get to his present when he is done being ridiculous about santa. ]
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Sure.
[They are, as mentioned, remixes of Dave's favourite movies on one, and then for the other they're songs that Dirk composed for Dave. The songs are named "Fraternality Sempiternal," "Semplice," "Shocked and Agape," and "Glucose Mobilities, Bro." The last track was contributed to by the rapping robots and in fact also the Magister singing, and dear Macklemeow doing as his name commands.
ALL THE TRACKS ARE FULL OF LOVE.]
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also he doesn't have his beard on it's just around his neck. while he like listens to all this stuff straight up before shifting his gaze to dirk.
he should say something meaningful, or thanks, or - ]
D'you want your stuff now?
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If you want. Please.
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[ right. he will just go over to his dresser and rummage around. putting things in "his" areas usually negates any chance dirk will look at them, probably, because dirk is...good about things like that? so.
but dirk gets a box and a flashdrive handed over. ]
I got you less things. [ THIS TROUBLES HIM GREATLY ]
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[He takes the box and also the flashdrive. He will open the box first?]
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there is also a thick book, which is full of loose-leaf paper absolutely fucking covered in dave's handwriting. ]
Opinions.
[ AS...AN EXPLANATION...
like, it's dave, he can't dissert without getting distracted, but he made some sort of weirdly concentrated effort to give (occasionally contrary his actual opinions but not always) dirk the weirdest fucking collection of essays in the world. they would be terribly marked, because he cannot write in a straight line to save his life. also, the topics are...questionable. who needs an essay on ties vs. sharks? why is that even a thing that can be "vs."?? but sandwiched between the absurd are a few better-ish written ones on a few topics dave completely refused to get into debates about, or dropped, or only pretended to know partly when he actually knew what was being talked about.
why did he spend time on this idiocy ]
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It's the best gift Dirk could ever ask for. He hugs Dave without even asking about the flashdrive as he intended. He needs to hug his brother.]
Thank you.
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well god help dirk when he reads all that nonsense because it's 99% horrendous. dave makes a surprised sound at the hug but doesn't fight it, for obvious reasons.
(btw that flash drive is that claymation monster movie he was "maaaaaaaaaybe not" about letting dirk see and he's still ?????? about it but whatever.) ]
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Also Dirk probably won't cry but his feelings will be on par with crying. Because he desperately wanted to see that claymation monster movie.]
I love you.
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Love you too, Bro. [ see
this would be touching
but they're in santa outfits and dirk might be wearing his fake beard ]
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We should eat.
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Yeah, ok. What do you wanna eat? [ MAKING ZERO EFFORT TO LET GO OR MOVE... ]
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I found this recipe for apple pancakes.
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