WHAT EXACTLY WAS HE SUPPOSED TO DO WITH YOU ANYWAY?
YEAH I HEARD ABOUT THE MERMAID THING HE WAS TELLING ME THAT DIRK SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN CHARGE OF MOVING ALL THE ANIMALS FOR THE VOLCANO BECAUSE HE COULD TALK TO THEM VIA MERSPEAK OR WHATEVER THE FUCK. SURE. DIRK CAN DO THAT.
yeah apparently im a merman now too because correcting him about that felt like a lot of effort so clearly the path of least resistance was agreeing that my trials are harder than dirks and i guess getting him to agree to that though i wasnt trying to it just kinda happened
OH MY GOD HAS HE MET THE TWO OF YOU IN PERSON? OR DOES HE THINK YOU'RE JUST PART TIME MERMEN YOU CAN JUST POP YOUR FINS OFF AND HANG THEM OFF A PALM TREE WHENEVER YOU'RE TIRED OF SWIMMING.
hes met me idk about dirk but this doesnt seem to stop his steadfast belief im pretty sure dirk told him he wasnt a mermaid and then just like gave up and said yeah probably he didnt protest more than once though but i havent seen the chatlogs so i couldnt really say
ALRIGHT I GUESS YOU'RE A MERMAN NOW. IF HE SAYS SO AND DIRK AGREED TO THIS NEW LIFESTYLE THEN IT MUST BE TRUE. IT ONLY TOOK ONE LOUD, ICE SKATING HUMAN TO SEE IT.
i mean if you wanna try to correct him you can but personally i find it sort of endearingly amusing when im reminded of it since i keep completely forgetting and then find out every so often hes still trying to win
IF IT'S LASTED THIS LONG THEN I AM PRETTY SURE EVEN IF I EXPLAINED TO HIM THAT YOU ARE DEFINITELY NOT A MERMAN, HE WOULDN'T BELIEVE ME. WHAT IF HE DEMANDS PROOF? THAT IS WAY TOO MUCH WORK TO DISPROVE SOMETHING THAT'S ACTUALLY FUNNY.
that was my basic feeling as soon as i figured out wtf was going on though i didnt ask dirk what was up i just assumed he was up to shenanigans kid probably couldve gotten an answer sooner had he not told me straight off he needed a straight answer from me tbh
[ "dave strider i need a straight answer from you" was shockingly a bad tactic to take to get a straight answer, somehow, ]
DID HE EVEN GIVE YOU A TOPIC TO GET A STRAIGHT ANSWER FOR? IT IS LIKE HE WE JUST SETTING HIMSELF UP FOR FAILURE. FAILURE WAS THE VOLCANO, BUT INSTEAD OF DIVERTING ITS FIERY EXPLOSION HE JUST WALKED STRAIGHT INTO IT. UGH THAT WAS A WEAK METAPHOR. MOVING ON. NO THAT WAS A BAD PLAN
nah he just needed a straight answer were i him i would have opened with hey are you dave strider because a yes to that question would have counted as a straight answer in all likelihood
WELL THE REAL QUESTION HERE IS WOULD YOU HAVE JUST STOPPED AS "YES" OR WOULD YOU HAVE GONE OFF IN SOME TANGENT FOLLOWING THAT CONFIRMATION? BECAUSE I FEEL AS IF THE TANGENT WOULD NEGATE IT BEING A STRAIGHT ANSWER.
sometimes i can give straight answers i gave him the right question to ask because i felt bad so there are some things that i wont fuck around with i suppose even though i guess i wasnt even trying to avoid a straight answer for a while there since i forgot but i just didnt give one out of habit or basically just how i speak idk its not like im unaware my tangents irritate a fair amount of people but like why bother stopping at this point
EVERYONE DOES BULLSHIT THAT IRRITATES EVERYONE ELSE. SOME HABITS ARE MORE ANNOYING THAN OTHERS BUT FOR THE MOST PART, WHO GIVES A FUCK. IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'RE HURTING ANYONE BY RAMBLING FOR TEN SWEEPS UNLESS YOU'RE TRYING TO BEAT THREE TRIALS I GUESS?? SHIT I WONDER HOW LONG HE WOULD HAVE ATTEMPTED IF YOU DIDN'T FEEL BAD.
idk but in addition to trying that long he apparently nearly set himself on fire for it so like i had to let him off? and then set him up for other trials i guess but look i cant not fuck with someone that gullible and its not like you wont eventually give in either
IF YOU WANTED ME TO GIVE IN YOU COULD HAVE GIVEN HIM A TRIAL THAT WASN'T LIKE STABBING MYSELF IN THE BLOOD PUMPER. OF ALL MOVIES.... YOU HAD TO CHOOSE THAT ONE, DAVE? ALSO I AM TRYING TO CONNECT THE DOTS HERE AND FIGURE OUT HOW HE ALMOST MANAGED TO SET HIMSELF AFLAME. SO FAR I DO NOT SEE HOW THE LINES CONNECT POINT A TO POINT B HERE.
I WILL TAKE THAT OFF OF MY LIST OF POTENTIAL BRIBES THEN. JEGUS I GUESS I'D SAY IF IT MEANT THE BASE WOULDN'T GET BURNT DOWN. ALTHOUGH IN THAT CASE, IT'D BE INTERESTING TO SEE HOW IT COULD GET BURNT DOWN WHILE UNDERWATER. WHICH..... ACTUALLY NO I FEEL LIKE PARADOX SPACE WOULD FIND A WAY TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN NEVER MIND.
LOOK IF EVERYONE HAS ENOUGH BAD LUCK, MATHEMATICALLY SPEAKING, IT SHOULD JUST CANCEL EACH OTHER OUT AT ONE POINT? AND THEN WE'D ALL HAVE BE THE LUCKIEST BASTARDS ALIVE.
WOW DAVE WHAT IF SOMEONE GOES THROUGH SOME TRAGIC ACCIDENT THAT MAKES THEM FOREVER HOW TO BOTH RIDE A BIKE AND FIST BUMP? PRETTY THOUGHTLESS OF YOU. OK YEAH I CAN'T KNIT SO FOOD OR TOYS IT IS.
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YEAH I HEARD ABOUT THE MERMAID THING
HE WAS TELLING ME THAT DIRK SHOULD HAVE BEEN IN CHARGE OF MOVING ALL THE ANIMALS FOR THE VOLCANO BECAUSE HE COULD TALK TO THEM VIA MERSPEAK OR WHATEVER THE FUCK.
SURE. DIRK CAN DO THAT.
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yeah apparently im a merman now too
because
correcting him about that felt like a lot of effort
so clearly the path of least resistance was agreeing that my trials are harder than dirks
and i guess getting him to agree to that
though i wasnt trying to it just kinda happened
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HAS HE MET THE TWO OF YOU IN PERSON?
OR DOES HE THINK YOU'RE JUST PART TIME MERMEN
YOU CAN JUST POP YOUR FINS OFF AND HANG THEM OFF A PALM TREE WHENEVER YOU'RE TIRED OF SWIMMING.
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but this doesnt seem to stop his steadfast belief
im pretty sure dirk told him he wasnt a mermaid
and then just like gave up and said yeah
probably he didnt protest more than once though but i havent seen the chatlogs so i couldnt really say
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IF HE SAYS SO AND DIRK AGREED TO THIS NEW LIFESTYLE THEN IT MUST BE TRUE.
IT ONLY TOOK ONE LOUD, ICE SKATING HUMAN TO SEE IT.
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but personally i find it sort of endearingly amusing when im reminded of it
since i keep completely forgetting and then find out every so often
hes still trying to win
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WHAT IF HE DEMANDS PROOF?
THAT IS WAY TOO MUCH WORK TO DISPROVE SOMETHING THAT'S ACTUALLY FUNNY.
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though i didnt ask dirk what was up i just assumed he was up to shenanigans
kid probably couldve gotten an answer sooner had he not told me straight off he needed a straight answer from me tbh
[ "dave strider i need a straight answer from you" was shockingly a bad tactic to take to get a straight answer, somehow, ]
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IT IS LIKE HE WE JUST SETTING HIMSELF UP FOR FAILURE.
FAILURE WAS THE VOLCANO, BUT INSTEAD OF DIVERTING ITS FIERY EXPLOSION HE JUST WALKED STRAIGHT INTO IT.
UGH THAT WAS A WEAK METAPHOR. MOVING ON.
NO THAT WAS A BAD PLAN
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were i him i would have opened with
hey are you dave strider
because a yes to that question would have counted as a straight answer in all likelihood
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WOULD YOU HAVE JUST STOPPED AS "YES" OR WOULD YOU HAVE GONE OFF IN SOME TANGENT FOLLOWING THAT CONFIRMATION?
BECAUSE I FEEL AS IF THE TANGENT WOULD NEGATE IT BEING A STRAIGHT ANSWER.
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i gave him the right question to ask because i felt bad so
there are some things that i wont fuck around with i suppose
even though i guess i wasnt even trying to avoid a straight answer for a while there since i forgot
but i just didnt give one out of habit
or basically just how i speak
idk its not like im unaware my tangents irritate a fair amount of people but like
why bother stopping at this point
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SOME HABITS ARE MORE ANNOYING THAN OTHERS BUT FOR THE MOST PART, WHO GIVES A FUCK.
IT'S NOT LIKE YOU'RE HURTING ANYONE BY RAMBLING FOR TEN SWEEPS
UNLESS YOU'RE TRYING TO BEAT THREE TRIALS I GUESS??
SHIT I WONDER HOW LONG HE WOULD HAVE ATTEMPTED IF YOU DIDN'T FEEL BAD.
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i had to let him off?
and then
set him up for other trials i guess but look
i cant not fuck with someone that gullible
and its not like you wont eventually give in either
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OF ALL MOVIES.... YOU HAD TO CHOOSE THAT ONE, DAVE?
ALSO
I AM TRYING TO CONNECT THE DOTS HERE AND FIGURE OUT HOW HE ALMOST MANAGED TO SET HIMSELF AFLAME.
SO FAR I DO NOT SEE HOW THE LINES CONNECT POINT A TO POINT B HERE.
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because
i wanted apple pie?
apparently he cant cook so dont let him bribe you with food
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JEGUS I GUESS I'D SAY IF IT MEANT THE BASE WOULDN'T GET BURNT DOWN.
ALTHOUGH IN THAT CASE, IT'D BE INTERESTING TO SEE HOW IT COULD GET BURNT DOWN WHILE UNDERWATER.
WHICH..... ACTUALLY NO I FEEL LIKE PARADOX SPACE WOULD FIND A WAY TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN NEVER MIND.
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just test our collective bad luck tbh
though im hoping that doesnt hold to like the 9th?
that would suck
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IF EVERYONE HAS ENOUGH BAD LUCK, MATHEMATICALLY SPEAKING, IT SHOULD JUST CANCEL EACH OTHER OUT AT ONE POINT?
AND THEN WE'D ALL HAVE BE THE LUCKIEST BASTARDS ALIVE.
[ that's....... not math at all but ok ]
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i want his first birthday to not be crappy
the magisters i mean
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I WILL BE ON MY VERY BEST BEHAVIOR ANS NOT TEMPT THE UNIVERSE TO ENSURE THAT HIS FIRST BIRTHDAY DOESN'T FOLLOW OUR APPARENT CURSE.
[ even though he probably does not have a sense of what a birthday is ]
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since like
where else could everyone meet up he could hang
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UH
WHAT THE HELL DO FISH WANT AS WRIGGLING DAY GIFTS?
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you never forget
also
im not entirely sure but he likes food and toys
rose has knit him shit before?
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WHAT IF SOMEONE GOES THROUGH SOME TRAGIC ACCIDENT THAT MAKES THEM FOREVER HOW TO BOTH RIDE A BIKE AND FIST BUMP?
PRETTY THOUGHTLESS OF YOU.
OK YEAH I CAN'T KNIT SO FOOD OR TOYS IT IS.
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