parodeity | WEEK ZERO: FRIDAY, EVENING, ROOM 112

WEEK ZERO: FRIDAY, EVENING, ROOM 112

[ SO. when kaito and jason finally congregate in the room pre the time they apparently have to be there, they will find dave - who has been in and out all day - on one of the beds, cross-legged. he's not yet aware there are three people, but can be easily kicked to the futon. the fourteen-year-old has a METRIC FUCKTON of red pens and a lot of paper pads, all monogrammed with the motel logo and shit, on the bed? and also on the bedside table? and scattered around? THERE ARE 200 OF THESE THINGS, WHY.

he also has for some reason a set of dentures on the nightside table. what the fuck is he doing. anyway his rules are on the bed to the side and he's mostly drawing terrible comics of terrible quality to pin up around the room later or something, but once everyone is there he will kind of look up and start off with: ]

The television doesn't work, so I'm pretty sure they're gonna kill us. How am I gonna get by without my soaps.

[ dry and deadpan and not (entirely) serious. ]

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[. . . WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PENS. . .]

Ooooi. Have you taken up pen collecting to ease the emptiness of the broken television?

[right. by now he's kind of dropped the Kid act, because a) he doesn't recognize anyone here, and b) he's so cranky give him a break]

[A... GOOD QUESTION. Don't mind Jason as he almost steps on one as he walks in. Stops midsteph. Picks it up instead to squint at it? And subsequently squint at Dave? Uh.]

Pen collecting and interior redecorating. [WHY ARE THERE SO MANY PENS. GESTURES AT THESE PENS?? It's like abstract art, if abstract art were made out of pens.] Seriously, dude. Where the hell did you get all of these?

[Also, hello? He doesn't know either of you yet? And he's still totally in his Robin suit, so. You know. Good first impressions all around.]

The front desk at the lobby. They apparently have infinite Pens, because try though I did, I could not clean them out.

[ HE TRIED REALLY HARD and then kept them all? for some reason? ]

I'm Dave. [ hi jason. ]

[grunts and picks up a pen himself, immediately twirling it around his fingers, palming it, and making it disappear. it reappears in his other hand moments later as he makes his way over to the closet]

Ka-- Kid.

[what was that aborted word]

[also he glances at Jason next, fully expecting him to follow the introduction train]

And you tried to clean them out, because—?

[His roommates are weirdos. Death was more comfortable? He is freaked out enough and does not need this, gosh. Throwing a glance at "Kid", though, he cocks an eyebrow. Or, you know, tries to. Eyebrows are not very visible under domino masks. Oops.]

Robin. [Without missing a beat.] I'd say nice to meet you, but that's probably the wrong thing to say after getting kidnapped.

.......Are you guys really gonna make me call you by obvious aliases. Can I take back "Dave" and make you call me somethin' else. Like Pimpmaster D-Stri.

[ COME ON????????????????? ]

Nice to meetcha, Pimpmaster D-Stri.

[that shit-eating grin, coupled with the response, probably makes his answer obvious. EVEN THOUGH DAVE HAS A POINT, HERE. . .]

-- hey, d'you guys know there are extra clothes in the closets?

What, haven't you ever met a guy named Robin?

[SO RUDE, PIMPMASTER D-STRI. But also, right on point. He doesn't make much of a fuss, in any case. That said—]

Do you think I'd be wearing this [POINTS. AT ALL THE BLOOD?] if I knew there were extra clothes in the closets? Go check. If we're lucky, we'll find real clothes instead of whatever theme they're going for here.

I like my godtier duds. But uh, we could maybe all stand to look less like second-rate superheroes, even if I have the decency not to go "sup, I'm the Knight of Time."

[ dave gets to his feet to go check the closet with kaito. his eyebrows go up. ]

Huh. Are some of these yours, Kid? Because some of this shit sure is mine.

[any sassy reply he might've had for Dave dies in his throat, because-- yep. he recognizes that hoodie. those jeans. that t-shirt. his expression twists into a scowl]

Yeah, definitely. Creepy, don't ya think?

[he grabs a sweater and a pair of jeans and tosses it on a bed, his gaze flickering towards Jason, taking in those blood stains]

[and then he grabs another sweater (not his, probably Dave's, maybe Jason's WHO KNOWS) and throws it at the bloody bird]

Oi. You okay?

[Yeah. Those... sure are all of their clothes in there. He recognizes a couple of his things as well, and it doesn't really help him (pretend to) keep his cool. Kaito is totally a pal, though, and that sweater miraculously belongs to him. Hooray? Or not. Because this is all super duper creepy.]

Don't worry. [Shrugging as he checks the sweater, his tone light. Like he's saying a joke.] Most of this is mine.

[That's not reassuring, Jason Todd?? And also not a real answer to his question. Either way, here's a subject change.]

How do you think they got their hands on our clothes? Grabbing people off the street's one thing, but stealing our belongings means they've been watching us long enough to know where we live.

[Not creepy at all, right?]

[ dave lives in texas, none of these sweaters are his. although he Mysteriously mostly has long-sleeved shirts and a lot of jeans and sweats. there are a few short-sleeved items, but mostly he seems to like to cover up. ]

Same way they got us. They nicked me from another universe on a meteor hurtling through space, so it ain't like we got nabbed overnight with chloroform.

[ he is not even going to bother to hide homestuck. dave grabs a record tee and some red pajama pants he recognizes as his, and sets about changing. he does not remove his shades at any point. unlike these other losers he isn't covered in blood at all, but he does have a Variety Of Scars like he gets in swordfights a lot or something. he's pretty fast and efficient. ]

[YEAH THAT ISN'T AN ANSWER TO HIS QUESTION JASON TODD!! stares at him for a few seconds more, but decides to let it slide in the end while he changes as well. +1 for the cool scar club, btw]

I was injured before I got here.

[jerks a thumb at his right side, below his abdomen, where there are traces of dried blood]

But it's gone now. So in addition to stealing our belongings, they must've kept us unconscious for a while. Long enough for deep gashes to heal.

[. . . honestly that theory kind of sends an unpleasant chill down his spine, but. it's the only thing that explains his suddenly healed state]

[... ALRIGHT, DAVE. +1 for the cool scar club over here as well, though he'll be leaving on the domino mask. And also reaching for a pair of pants because no one needs him running around in shorts and a sweater.]

Ditto. Though I'm not sure time is what patched us up. [He was... dead, after all. Time can't heal that.] They might have something else. Some way to heal people without leaving a scratch on them.

[And some way to reanimate the dead, though he won't mention that.]

Eh, you'd be surprised what can be done with that kinda shit. You could get blown the hell up or shot the hell up and come out of it with a bunch of blood on you but not a single scratch. Just depends on the methodology.

[ not that he speaks from experience

aside from those being specific examples, in his experience, ]

[I]

[what]

Do you two have some sorta experience with supernatural healing techniques, or something?

Wouldn't call them "supernatural." More like metahumans can do all kinds of crazy stuff.

[No... explanation of what meta humans are, of course.]

I guess you could call them supernatural healin' techniques, sure. People die a lot back home.

[ he will go back to sitting on the bed with most of the pens. ]

And then they stop bein' dead after some bullshit. It happens.

[I]

[WHAT]

. . . people don't just come back from the dead like that. It's impossible.

Hey, some people do. Shit just happens, right?

[#comics

And n...ot.......talking from experience, or anything.]

Wouldn't spend too much time thinking about it, anyway. It doesn't sound like everyone here's from the same place.

We're all pretty much from alternate universes, yeah.

[ blandly. like that's normal. ]

[opens mouth]

[closes it again]

[stares at Jason, in particular, making note of that blood earlier]

[. . . maybe he just won't say anything right now. he doesn't like prying]

Sounds like it. I still don't get it, but I won't ask any more questions.

[He's not missing that look, but thanks for not bringing it up, pal. This is a conversation for later.

Right now, though, Jason stretches his arms and proceeds to flop down on the couch.]

Great. Now that we got life and death covered, how 'bout we ask the important questions? [Which is to say—] Have you guys found any clues as to why we're here?

To piss us off is my best guess.

[ SUPER DRYLY. ]

But aside from the Lovecraft references? Nah.

[gestures towards Dave]

Ditto.

[now that he's changed into jeans and a sweater, he's folding his suit into a pile]

But I'm getting a real Lovecraft murder mystery vibe, here.

Great. That makes three of us.

[His suit's a mess so unlike Kaito's neat ass, Jason isn't even going to try.]

So we're stuck playing a game called "how long before something tries to take a bite out of us"? Probably something with tentacles. That might wanna sacrifice us to an event bigger monster with tentacles. Because that's just what we all needed.

Probably human sacrifice will come into it, yeah, or changin' into monsters? Those are both book themes for the dude, aren't they?

. . . I wonder if we can find a copy of the Necronomicon to help us out. . .

[YOU KNOW, just in case they come face to face with any of those Lovecraft monsters. right?]

Edited 2017-05-24 23:55 (UTC)

Good idea. But that would imply they left anything helpful laying around here. Seems kind of out of character for our "host."

[save them]

[ raises hand ]

I'm not like an encyclopedia but I remember shit about a fair amount of his stuff.

[ as an explanation if they glance over at him: ] My sister is reaaaaaaaaally into Lovecraft and shit.

[oh right, he remembers this!!]

Maybe we could start calling you The Daveinomicon, then. Instead of Pimpmaster Di-Stri.

[Bless you, Dave's mystery sister.]

Davomicon? Danomicon? There's gotta be a way to make that roll off the tongue easier. [OH, WELL.] Works for me, I guess. You can be our resident expert on all the ways things could go horribly wrong.

Yay me. [ the most deadpan yay me ever. ] But I can at least attempt to recognize any ridiculous Lovecraft monsters, sure. If we find any. Which I would prefer not? Which is why I assume we're totally gonna.

Ha ha ha. Expect the worst, so when it happens you aren't surprised.

That's one method of coping.

Or one method of being realistic. If they brought us here, I'm pretty damn sure it isn't for a tea party.

[He gets a feeling they're fucked, is what he's saying.]

Nah, if you kidnap a bunch of people from different dimensions, there's usually a reason. Because who has that much power to throw around for not a great reason? Or...well, I doubt it's great, but it's probably important. To them. Whoever they are.

I hate tea, and if this turned out to be a tea party with Cthulhu, I'd be happy.

[BUT MORE SERIOUSLY--]

Y'know, if they were gonna grab people from all over the universe, why didn't they ask first?

Asking people politely if they want to be kidnapped isn't, y'know, how a kidnapping works. Sorry to break it to you, dude.

[SORRY, KAITO.]

The reason why is what's worrying me. We don't even know what kind of "preparations" that guy over the PA was talking about.

Yeah crazy people usually just do what the fuck ever without warnin' in my experience. It's kinda their jam. But preparations...got me. We don't have a shit ton of stuff to go off of just yet. It might actually be a wait and see game.

[groans]

The worst kinda game, if you ask me.

Tell me about it. But unless we find a secret passage or a way to get past all that fog without getting lost? It doesn't sound like we got much of a choice.

I am not entirely convinced the fog wouldn't do shit to us anyway. That's kind of a staple horror trope. We wander out there, come back different, murder ensues.

[makes a face]

So we. . . what? Sit around, avoid stupid Lovecraft and horror movie tropes, and hope for the best? Gee, sounds riveting.

Sure does. But if you have any better ideas, feel free to toss 'em into the ring.

I'm thinkin' we look around, wait for further announcements, and try not to break any rules until we know the score?

[guuuuh]

As much as I hate to agree. . .

[sighs]

I agree.

... Yeah. Ditto.

[SORRY, KAITO.]

Guess that's that, huh?

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WEEK ZERO: FRIDAY, EVENING, ROOM 112

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